Black Hearts, Gold Minds

My mother once told me to marry outside my race. “Find a white man who will love you and treat you good.” she said. Consequently, the words “Daughter, always love yourself…” never meant the same thing to me again.

I know in my heart of hearts that my mother wants only what’s best for me. I believe her saying that, was her way of protecting me from the eternal hurt and banality of Black love. Black love that I so freely and wistfully bask in now. Irony I suppose.

All things considered, she hindered me too, from the intricacy of self-love.

Unbeknownst to mummy, I had taken that advice to mean, Black men were not good enough for me. Not physically, not mentally and Lord knows, not financially. That is the reality she lived in back then.

Plus, everyone knows I’d only be setting myself up for dark skinned, nappy headed babies.

Babies that look like me.

Babies that look like my mother.

To be fair, with motherhood being what it was in her childhood days, I think she was counselling me the best way she knew how. Were we to give this deed a name, ignorance would be the easy label, but it’s far more complex than that.

What it is, unfortunately, is that my mother has never seen an unsuccessful Caucasian male. The average Caucasian male is born and raised to take up a mantle of wealth at some point in his life. Whereas the average Black male is born and raised to be a man, a ‘real man’. A concept that is entirely based on the societal construct of his era.

Crucial life lessons on attaining and maintaining generational wealth are not taught nor are they a cultural subset in the average Black family.

But I feel an awakening.

There is a new wave of change. A wave that has been a long time coming.

A dawn of open minded youth are here and they are raising the decibels of the whisper in the dark.

The whisper is now becoming a shout. A shout which we should all make our mantra as a black uplifted nation.

“It is our duty to fight for our freedom.
It is our duty to win.
We must love each other and support each other.
We have nothing to lose but our chains.”

-Assata Shakur

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