My love/hate relationship with Graphic Design.
A musing into life as a graphic designer and a long winded egg analogy.
It took me a long time to 'feel' like a graphic designer.
I went into design as more of suggestion of what other people thought I would be good at. Not that I blame them for my current conundrum, because ultimately I found something that for the most part, I enjoy doing. But it isn’t enough.
The Egg Analogy
When I started at university I was essentially an egg. (Stay with me. The analogy isn’t going to be as odd as it seems.)
An egg is really just a untapped potential when you think about it.
A blob of potential, swimming in a gloop of opportunity. Encased in a fragile shell of self-preservation.
If we consider university to be a giant incubator, every student is an egg of unhatched(sorry!) potential. Much like real birds, they don’t all hatch out at the same time. Some break out early on because they’re ready to burst out of the walls of self-preservation and stumble out into the world. Others take a while to get the confidence to even beginning cracking that outer shell.
Even with that rather long winded analogy, I’m pretty sure you can grasp which type of egg I was.
If you didn’t, I’m the third kind.
Wait Mitali, you only told us about two types of eggs?
Exactly, I’m the egg that hatched late and is still wearing the top half of the eggshell over my head, stumbling about without a clue of what to do with this potential, now that I’m a graphic design grad/hatchling.
See? Told you it was a long winded analogy.
The Passion Problem
So I’m a half arsed hatchling with a shell on my head does that mean I hate design or fear it?
Neither. I genuinely do have a soft spot for design.
I wouldn’t say it’s my passion. Heck, I love it at times but I don’t have the same fire for it as many of my peers do.
I know people who are passionate about it, like really, truly in love with it. It’s their craft and it shows in their enthusiasm for design and their work is phenomenal because of it. I love that. I love seeing people shine and take pride in the work they create because they’re in love with art of design.
I just wish I could figure out what makes me tick like that.
I sit on the fence when it comes to design.
Mostly because I don’t always know if it’s my thing.
The Search for a Purpose
Everyone has a thing. The thing that turns a blob of potential into a bird of purpose. (Will the egg analogies ever end?)
I haven’t found mine, yet.
I will… eventually I think.
But I’m not sure it lies in my being a graphic designer. It’s definitely something creative but I am yet to find it.
Maybe the problem is I have too many interests, too many things I want to do but no idea how to narrow them down into things that make me tick.
And then turning said things that make me tick into something that can make me money. Because as much as we would all like to be vagabonds following our passions for free, free doesn’t get you a roof over your head and food in your belly as unfortunate as it is.
Dabble, Dabble in everything
I’m a dabbler by nature, I enjoy dabbling in different things it’s fun but it does mean I often have the attention span of a hyperactive child fueled on all the sugar they can their hands on.
It’s not excuse for anything really, I’m sure if I put my mind to one thing I’d get it done but I’d hate doing it.
I like trying lots of things and seeing what sticks, so far not a lot but I’m trying, so that counts for something right? Maybe? No? Okay.
Dabbling is fun. Sticking is difficult.
Sticking means making a commitment and taking a risk.
Dabbling let’s me run away and keep the stupid eggshell on my head.
I think it’s time I tried to stick to something, one thing maybe two but stick to something.
Not even necessarily graphic design but something.