Why Exactly is ‘Social Justice Warrior’ an Insult?

“Conservatives” (a misnomer to me, since obliterating humanity doesn’t seem conservative) LOVE to rant about Social Justice Warriors. My turn.

Question: What is it about the term that bothers you, exactly, as you cower in your doomsday prep shelter, stacking money, armed just in case someone whose skin falls below “eggshell” on a paint swatch wanders into your gated community?

Is it the “Social” part?

Sure, you hate socialism (it’s so terrible in Denmark and the U.K., after all). But now you don’t like anything “social” at all? Isn’t that the purpose of your elite clubs and “going to a social” at least? Is society (I mean other than “society” as in rich folk who don $5000 dresses to attend $500 dinners where they raise $100 for the homeless) not at all important anymore?

Is it the “Justice”?

Maybe that’s it. Between the rationalizing you do about the hailstorm of racist policy and language that rains daily on the granite words “justice for all”, the muslim ban, and deciding the hell with the whole Ellis Island / immigrant-land thing — like that was just our schtick for a while — it is true that “justice” has become a word that is in your mouth more ironic than anything in the song by that name… but you’re not even pretending to care about it anymore?

Maybe it’s the “Warrior”?

Picture a warrior of any kind — samurai, soldier, tribesman, medieval knight. So he or she should be fighting for — what? The knights we admired as children should not be social justice warriors, helping the poor or rescuing damsels? They should be in the castle, having peasants bring them buckets of gold, as they ‘honorably’ accept it? The samurai should ‘honorably’ rob the rice farmer and move to the next village?

Put another way, what would be something other than “social justice” in some form — that’s worth fighting for?

Oh, I forgot, “state’s rights” was a legit cause in the U.S.

So that’s where we are now — 1860 — and the calendar keeps flying backward, apparently. The 1960s never happened. The whole fighting the nazis thing, I guess, a failure of diplomatic relations.

But then maybe you are actually so futuristically hip and cool with your ironic lingo that you “Real Americans” (ha,ha) have just decided on ironic use of every word in the lexicon of American values (the way you use “values”, again, good one).

That’s it!

We old-school centrists are so dense. You’re kind of the secret sneering teenage ironists of our day, disguised in your conservative garb which — wait a minute — I get it — is also ironic. You’re so ironic it’s completely punk rock!

So actually — this whole thing is more anarchist-left than Antifa! It’s all political performance art and now you’re using all these terms in a way that mocks their actual meaning. Mystery solved!

In that case… maybe Donald Trump is an edgy one-man show and full-time performance-artist, a secret New York art scene product of the 1970s, only pretending to be the most obtuse imaginable embodiment of The Ugly American, until he finally breaks character as all global institutions crumble around him. If that’s it, he’s edgier than any Marina Abramović or Warhol — well done.

Just to be even more ironic than your ironic use of the term, though, and to one-up you secret sneering masses of costumed freaks, I am going to be literal and say this:

I am a social justice warrior, if any kind of warrior at all. I believe in the concept of justice in society and will in my way fight for it.