Finding your ‘reason why’

In my videos and articles I talk a lot about the importance of having a “why”… Why? Because it’s what keeps you going, it has a very high potential of killing procrastination and more importantly in the face of adversity, pain, fear and defeat, it’s the single most important factor that decides whether you lose or win.

Remember winning doesn’t only mean short-term victory. It also, and more importantly means attaining your goal after weeks, months and even years of striving and grinding. That’s when you need a damn strong why. And I’ll help you get one, right here, right now. Let’s do this sh*t, no more talking, let’s get us some real-time action and start changing things!

The Push-Pull principle

Your Why could be on of two things or both: Something that Pushes you — Something that Pulls you. Let me explain.

Something that pushes you mostly has to do with an event in the past associated with an intense emotion, positive or negative. It is something you’ve experienced and now dictates your response to certain events.

Push e.g. You’ve invested in an expensive sales course and because of it you’ve gotten a 50% increase in salary over the last three months. When they ask you to invest in another sales course you will most likely apply, because now, your positive past experience tells you to act, because of the benefits you’ve reaped from it. It pushes you to take action. An example of a negative experience, has the same result. For instance, let’s say you are a competitive marathon runner and you’ve dreamed of winning your local event for years. Past year you came very close, you ended up in second place. You realise that the guy who won prepared 10 weeks before the event instead of 8 like you. I bet you will make sure, if you are super serious about winning, you prepare 12 weeks before. Because ending up second is a NO-GO for you, and you don’t want to experience defeat again.


A pull is something that ‘pulls’ you toward a certain feeling or emotion you want to experience in the future. It is not yet there, yet you visualise how it feels, smells, looks, sounds and gets you all excited about attaining it. For instance: Many people start the Wim Hof Method 10-week program ( , something I am currently involved with), because they’ve heard that it battles disease, increases your immune system, helps you sleep better, aids you in post-workout recovery and makes you more resistant to cold. A possible image of the end result they might have after a 10-week course is them never experiencing any cold again, show off how they can keep their breath for 5 minutes and do 80 pushups, and become a Wim Hof instructor so they can help other people with these benefits.

Wim Hof — The Ice man

You why has a strong connection to your emotions

As you’ve seen in these examples, your Why has a lot to do with an emotion that is triggered inside of you. Something you don’t want to experience again, or something you want to experience somewhere in the future. Emotions are one the most powerful indicators of a why. The thing is that with most people this happens unconsciously, but now by ask the following questions we bring it to our awareness, so we can start choosing consciously what events we want to attract more of, and what we want to discard.

Questions to unveil your why:

What event evokes a very powerful positive emotion inside of you?

What do you want to accomplish by next year? What are you passionate about?

Who is the most important person in your Life?

What do you want to be known for?

How do you want to look or act in a year from now?

Take the time to answer these questions. Remember, it’s not what you know, it’s what you do! Actions are a good predictor of success.

How to proceed?

All these questions are a great indicator of your why. There are obviously a million of other questions you can ask yourself. For conveniences sake, let’s give a practical example of an answer and how we can proceed from there:

For instance with the question “what event evokes a powerful positive emotion inside of you” you might have answered “Sitting at a tropical beach for a whole day”. From here on you can proceed as you like. There are different degrees to it and it’s important you specify. The more specific and clearer the vision, the more likely it will evoke a powerful emotion. To pick your why here, you could say “It would be awesome to spend each summer vacation at a different tropical destination”.

Whether you like to spend vacation at a tropical beach or actually own a tropical island. Your ‘why’ is specific to you

Or if you take it to the next level . “I want to own my own tropical island, so that I can spend each vacation there”. Both the same feeling, but a different why. It all depends on what evokes that powerful emotion inside of you, and what gets you really going. For instance, when I think of owning my own island, that evokes a way more powerful emotion inside of me. Not because the dream is bigger, no. Because that’s what matters to me. And what matters to me, might be completely different to you. Everything is personal and specific to you and you only!


If you’ve done the exercises and then specified to the degree it get’s you going and creates a burning desire, you my friend have a powerful WHY for all of your thoughts, words and deeds that will change your course for the better, forever. You are well on your Path to becoming the most happy person in your Life.