Of all the things humanity has to fear in this world, statistically speaking, more people fear public speaking than almost anything else, including flying, snakes, heights, dogs, spiders, open spaces, closed spaces, dentists, and even death (FYI, death comes in as a distant second).
As the old joke goes, more people are afraid to give a eulogy at a funeral than be “in” the funeral. And I get it, speaking in front of a crowd can be scary business, especially if you are looking for approval. I speak in front of thousands each year and I can tell you the secret of how I was able to get over this fear: I was willing to get out of my comfort zone. I chose to feel the fear and do it anyway. I am a good example of how it is possible to get over our fears. But, first, we must accept that there is fear in us in the first place. We must not be afraid of fear or buy into it.
And we can start practicing with the fear of death.
The fact is, we are all afraid of death. And unfortunately, this is not allowing us to be more present and appreciate the gifts that life has for us. We are not even aware of our fear of death. We don’t want to talk about it, think about it, or discuss it with family and friends. It’s why so many people won’t do wills, plan funerals, or make arrangements for their deaths. For the most part, death is a taboo subject, something we know is coming, but best left undiscussed, until that time when our number comes up.
We actually don’t know who we are and why we are here. We cannot understand the real meaning of life or death. Of course, this is no way to live.
We must look at death square in the eye and embrace it with as much openness, awareness and love as we might embrace a newborn child. It is all part of the same beautiful fabric of eternity.
We must realize that death is not the ending or closed-door we are led to believe it is, or more accurately, that we allow our minds (and old tapes) to believe. And the longer we allow ourselves to continue this limited form of thinking, the more limited and meaningless our world will become, which keeps us from experiencing the day-to-day joy of living on earth. Turning death into an obsession of the mind robs us of the joy of today. It steals the moment and keeps us from Zero Frequency® — realizing our own divinity.
It is time to stop looking at death as this cosmic lottery that pops up numbers randomly, and to wake up to who we really are, and begin truly living the spiritual path we planned to live before we incarnated. We must live what we know in our hearts — death is simply a door into another room; we are like the caterpillar who sheds his cocoon to become a butterfly.
To know who we are is never to be afraid of anything again.
Therefore, the key to overcoming our fear of death is to simply remember who we are and why we’re here. While I have been getting a glimpse of who I am for some time, unafraid of death, there comes a time when we all need a reminder. Mine came from my mother.
While I was writing my latest book, Zero Frequency® (soon to be published), I had the opportunity to spend two precious days with my mother before she passed away. We had talked about death many times, and she had attended many of my seminars. This time, I was shocked by how clear she was about death.
She called some of her friends from the hospital and said, “I have finished my work here on earth. I need to go. Please stop thinking I will get better because it is holding me back.”
When some of my nieces or nephew cried, she told them, “This is not good for me. Please realize you don’t have to cry for me; I will be even closer to you when I go.”
At night, I stayed with my mother. She was having visions and communicating with loved ones who had passed before. We had the most profound conversations about forgiveness and love. I was able to appreciate her in a completely new way and was reminded what an amazing person she was. I am grateful to her for my life and everything she taught me. I am who I am because of her.
I am also grateful that she reminded me what my Soul already knows — death is not the end of life, nor something to be afraid of, but a welcome doorway back home. Our REAL home.
Welcoming death as a part of life will rid ourselves of the anxiety and fear we can easily feel living in a human body. Being aware of death will always take us to Zero — the deeper part of us that knows there is more to the world than what we can touch with our hands or see with our eyes. Being aware of death will help us let go of our fears, preconceptions, and regrets, and allow us to start living the life we deserve.
If we let it, death can be our greatest teacher on how to enjoy and live a bold and beautiful life.