I like the cut of your jib.

I’m about to get all opinionated. [Disclosure: I haven’t had a drink or recreational drug in 22 years. I’m a recovering addict, but my opinion is probably different from that of many in the 12-step community.]

Having a drinking problem doesn’t automatically make one an alcoholic. I think there are many people with various problems that don’t rise to the level of a disorder. Taking a break from a habit or behavior can help one get a handle on that habit or behavior.

“Maybe I’ll drink again. Maybe I won’t,” is like “One day at a time” without all that effin’ pressure and drama. As I mentioned in my disclosure, I’ve been not drinking (or indulging in other extracurricular chemicals) for a while now. By now, it’s just not on my radar much. I don’t wake up (like I used to) and make the decision not to drink. When it does come up, as it sometimes does, I lazily rely on my habit of not. But that doesn’t mean I never will. And that doesn’t mean I am doomed if I do have a drink.

Sorry if this comes across as preachy. I think I wrote this for myself, to myself, using this essay as a prompt. It dovetails with recently (New Years Eve) seeing a friend from the program drinking. When she realized I was at the party, she went into shame mode. I had to reassure her that she was ok. “Enjoy yourself right now. Decide tomorrow what you want to do tomorrow.” This is pretty much the opposite of what I am used to hearing in meetings.

Anyway, enough about me. I think what you are doing is great. Inspiring, even. Thanks for sharing your experience.