How many 180’s have you done?
I’m building a list…and topping that list is my views on drinking and getting drunk.
I’m not an alcoholic. I don’t think I am and not in an I am, but I’m in denial kind of way. I’m not. Although you could definitely take some times in my life that look an awful lot like alcoholic behavior. I don’t like labels — but that’s another story.
The 180. First saw drinking as something the bad kids did. Then I hit high school. The cool kids drank. I wanted to be cool I drank. Who the hell DOESN’T drink? (that’s my 180)
What’s even cooler…stealing hard liquor from my parents basement. Drinking shot for shot of Everclear my senior year in high school — and then because I weighed 90 pounds…found myself crawling across the tarp of a pool and then vaguely remember barking like a dog while sliding down the stairs on my stomach — only to later wake up puking bile all while wondering how they hell I got home. I look out my bedroom window at 5am and see my car parked not where I parked it. Thankfully I didn’t drive — I don’t think I did. Then…sweating bullets for everyone else to wake up so I could figure out what I did last night. It was 1990 — no social media. SCORE!
This plays on for say…10 or so more years — college, graduate, job, NYC. kids, marriage, divorce…
I don’t know when it hit me — but it hit me. Getting wasted for years — and still “succeeding” as PARTY GIRL! Funny how all the bad decisions (read into that as deep as you want) slurring, falling down, puking…you know, the normal price of being a “heavy drinker” — I guess I would just drink and forget and drink and forget…
Until that 180 day — when I was like WTF are you doing Marina? How is being DRUNK — helpful to you? What do you look like wasting HOURS at bars talking SHIT to other drunks wasting hours and bars talking shit. Fuck. That’s probably like 8 solid years of my life I wasted drinking.
Don’t fall for the drunk ass image trap. You aren’t your best wasted, falling down, slurring, sleeping with people and puking. Really, you aren’t. It’s okay if you are just now realizing that. I’m making up for lost time — and I didn’t quit drinking — I just don’t care about getting drunk anymore — ever.
Let’s talk about the trap — get women drunk and take advantage of them. No victim blaming here — but don’t fall for that trick — keep your MIND OPEN and NOT DRUNK.