Hamba Kahle #HateCity!
2014 was without a doubt one of the worst years of my life. Somehow after being sucked into its lower bowels for the last few months I managed to emerge with my limbs and soul intact.
To survive 2015 I need to move myself, somewhere away from a town built on the sweat and dreams of a gold rush that passed generations ago. The City of Gold is trying to destroy its inhabitants with the constant rat race for wealth and the failings of its leaders to keep the city in habitable condition.
Earning the nickname #HateCity, Johannesburg is one of the largest metropolis areas in Africa and reportedly the worlds largest city not built on a water source and largest man-made forest, all wrapped in one big angry mess. My time here has seen me transform from an infant to a semi-autonomous member of the working classes, even if I am one who wears a collared shirt. Those years have taught me a few things, only a few of which I truly regret.
- Follow your gut
While a great gut instinct can lead you to some of the cities finest eateries, letting your abdomen dictate life choices may seem crazy at first but it tends to lead you to choices closer to your inner being. Allowing your gut to make choices that the brain and heart do not need to justify has resulted in some of the happiest points of the last few years. Said heart and brain have been responsible for delaying the instincts of my internals resulting in heartache and anger for all those involved. - You don’t have to dream
As Tim Minchin pointed out in an earlier post, you don’t need to have a dream. If you focus too much on your dream, miles ahead of you, chances are you’ll miss those opportunities for new and interesting adventures that appear in your periphery. Have a general idea where you want to be but don’t allow it to become the all consuming dream you hear from mediocre reality TV show contestants. - Sometimes the right thing is not always the most comfortable thing. For most of 2014 I found myself consumed by a bitterness and anger from a relationship breakdown early in the year. I let that dominate my soul and being, making a treacherous being who spewed filth and venom. In the last few weeks I made the choice to put things right by those I’d wronged, including an innocent woman I spitefully betrayed. It’s not fun and it’s not sexy, but its right. To do so frees yourself and shows to you and others that you are not the venom that you spew.
- Define yourself by what you love and share it.
Too often you find people defining themselves by what they hate or what they look down on. Music, food, wine, travels and excitement. Do what makes you happy as long it doesn’t hurt others and doesn’t land anyone in prison. If you enjoy cheap, mass-produced beer instead of the 500 overpriced craft varieties that inhabit any Braamfontein bar, then so be it. Its your money and your body to fill with whatever taste suits your fancy. If you love something, such as a song or a food, enjoy it for all you can. Share it with those you feel closest too and don’t look down on those with tastes different to yours. - It’s ok to be wrong.
Referring back to Tim Minchin’s speech,“Opinions are like arse-holes, in that everyone has one but I would add that opinions differ significantly from arse-holes, in that yours should be constantly and thoroughly examined.”
Learn from those with more knowledge than you. By no means do you need to blindly accept their teachings, but if they offer a well thought out, evidence based rebuttal, back down and carry the new knowledge in your armoury. If you do this well you might even teach yourself something.
When I leave #HateCity, I will carry these lessons in my back pocket. Close by but just out of sight, allowing me to exist through repetition of old mistakes. Do not judge me for that, it’s a human characteristic that we repeat our same errors again and again, only learning with maturity and wisdom where the fault in our ways was.
Using the cliché of ‘This is my year’, 2015 needs to work for me. I land on my feet but I’ll need all my agility to make sure that happens, and not allow me to do a faceplant into the back-end of a city established to keep sailors fed and satisfied.
Photo Credit: Robert K
First published on www.mattblack.co in January 2015.
