I feel like I have nothing to ask for now, but everything to look forward to. I am not looking forward to any outcome or accomplishment, not to any dream, ambition or imagined future. I am looking forward to what life has in store for me. I want to be here so I can have enough data points to finally know, if life itself is worth living on the virtue of life itself.
It was only upon hindsight that I realised my experiments needed space to sit too, that the relentless focus on them would not benefit them in the long run, because I couldn’t retain the wider perspective necessary generate the needed range of diverse, serendipitous outcomes for a more dynamic convergence they would have had if I was simply less attached to their outcomes.