I am a Woman. You are a Trans Woman. And That Distinction Matters.

I was recently banned from an online community of women that I had relied on for years as my sole support from other mothers, for asking if anyone could recommend an online group FOR mothers since the group recently made explicit that it was not specifically for mothers. Formerly, before it changed names, it actually had “Mama” in the title and it was implicitly geared toward mothers and our concerns, although all women were welcome. At some point recently the moderators became radically invested in “centering” the experiences of trans women while attacking, censoring and blocking anyone who would so much as question their agenda. A woman who posted this very article was called “violent” ,and forced to “self-crit” or be banned. I was offered no such opportunity: I asked if anyone could recommend a mother-centric group (in that simple of terms) and before my question was approved the moderators banned me forever. From my only safe space as a mother. So sorry if when I’m seeking advice and support about pregnancy and mothering, trans women are not the people I’m looking to for community. Not that I even seek to exclude these women, but when talking about women’s issues, I’m not going to “center” them either.

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