Charlie Eisenhood Actually Writing All Ultiworld Articles Himself

The founding editor of Ultiworld, Charlie Eisenhood, has apparently been writing all of the website’s articles himself under more than two dozen pen names.

“It all started when I didn’t receive a single response after posting an article that Ultiworld was hiring more writers. I figured if I made up a person and ‘hired’ them, other people would be more likely to want to write for me.”

Things quickly escalated as he was forced to respond to emails and comments under a multitude of aliases. He also spent time practicing various voices for each member of his monthly podcast.

Eisenhood admitted things had begun to spiral out of control several years ago. “At first everything seemed manageable, but with the addition of the professional leagues in 2011 and 2012, and the explosion of the youth game, things quickly got out of hand.”

The biggest mistake he made was starting the “Powered by Agility — 5 Ultimate Breakdown” series, as the hours pouring over video for each team was a massive undertaking for one man pretending to be 16 different people.

“I still can’t believe that no one figured out what I was doing. I mean, I was getting pretty desperate when I made up names like Tad Wissel and Keith Raynor — I mean ‘Keith Raynor’ never once conducted an in-person interview! Come on people!”

At the time of publication, Eisenhood is considering laying off 2/3rds of his writers.