We’re not doing a startup…

We’re doing fighting robots FFS !!!

Try me again once and call me a “startuper” and I’ll fucking crush your mind over the phone with a psychic attack!

Honestly, I’ve never been a fan of this “startup” bullshit trend. But I had no idea how much I hated the whole concept until recently, when I was invited at a party where I knew nobody. Except one dude who appears to be a good friend :)
And this good friend, being faithful to his “good friend” position, had the delicacy to introduce me to some folks there because he knows how shy I can be (lol).

I was touched and I was already imagining that things would go smoothly. I was even impatient to meet all the new faces around.

How fucking naive !

The Incident

As we approached the first group, a dragon-level disaster happened:
“Hey guys, let me introduce my friend here. He’s an entrepreneur doing a startup.”

. . .

I swear to God, under normal circumstances, I would have scratched his ugly mug for mouthing off so much shit at once. But I was so shocked that I stopped breathing!

And as if it was not enough, the motherfucker facing us immediately answered:
“Oh that’s so cool, I’ve always wanted to be an entrepreneur :D
 Actually, I also have an idea… It’s an app… and hum… it’s to help social entrepreneurs… you know… to collaborate around the challenges we’re facing in terms of societal disruption. Well, it’s like Snapchat but for people who want to have an impact… you see ?”

At this point, I just left. Without saying a word. I litteraly disappeared.

I’m outta here bitchiz! #lightspeed

The Healing

After this traumatic experience, I decided to heal myself once and for all from this entrepreneurial plague. I found a cheap and efficient way to save my soul: I implemented a little cerebral algorithm to trick my brain into automatically shifting thoughts.

Basically, I run this code in my prefrontal cortex :

Disclaimer : I’m not the CTO ~(°x°)~

And it works !!! Whenever I see someone important at a conference or in a talk on Youtube saying “I’m an entrepreneur”, I just start laughing compulsively like a mad man !
Feels SO good !

The Conclusion

I’m a hardcore gamer doing fighting robots.

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