Em gái, I heard about your quasi-decision today. And I feel this urge to talk to you, to yell at you, to tell you all the things that I have learned over the year, in hard ways. But then I have talked too much. And I have too much to say. All these saying you must have heard from me once or twice or millions!!!

I had been in your shoes. I know how it feels to be so disoriented, depressed and alone. I am proud that I got out of it alive. Yeah, literally alive! And if I learned one thing from it, that it is to keep moving forward, facing rejection but moving forward. Do not divert your course! Break down all the obstacles in front of you. You may be wounded by the debris but getting out of it (and I am sure that you will get out just fine), you would never feel more alive. You have successfully navigated the maze. And you can finally let it sit right with yourself.

There is no pain like the pain of not doing things that you should be doing. And if you are like me at all, avoiding and diverting will only eat at you more. I took the risk of delaying my studying once more time this year. I decided to not go to England anymore and to invest time and effort to apply for American schools. You dont know how that change of the plan had costed me. But I am doing it. Do you know why? England would have been an easy choice. But it ate at me everyday that I were avoiding hardwork, avoiding the real thing that I want. I dont want to look back when I am 80 and think that I coward out.

Understand that you dont want to feel the pain. But pain is temporary! And it will get better. Tough times dont last, tough people do. If you dont rip off that urgo, the cut will never heal properly, I am telling you. There is nothing wrong with finding an easy way out. But are you sure that it IS the easy way out??

With all the examples in front of us, it’s definitely not. Delaying only makes it harder. I believe in this theory about life lesson that if you haven’t learn that lesson yet, you will have to learn it again and again. If you dont learn to handle rejection, to face challenges, to put through hard times, to deal with your own demon now, you will be learning it very soon in the future for sure. And it will only get harder then.

One point I definitely have to tackle is what you say about the economy. That is like the most stupid argument! =)) It is very well-known among people who dont know shit about the real world. You can’t be sure that the economy will look up. And even if it will, what does it have to do with you? Your friends will have been more experienced then. And Master Degree doesn’t mean shit, I am telling you. Unless you are going to a really good school, then it may mean something. But you have never learned to solve problems in real life, how do you plan to keep up with the real world? In all the years that I have been working, the knowledge that I learned from college were all thrown out the window!!! What stay are the skills. Or do you plan to be like this friend of mine back in RMIT. She kept studying to avoid life! She wants to pursue a PHD now and keeps dreaming about this entry job level with the salary of $5k. =_=

Any decision has its pros and cons. Once you make the decision, stick with it. But then there is no perfect time like the present time. And better learn things earlier than later. If you are not ready now, you wont be ready then. And it will be worse, because then you have no more excuse or escape!

I know I have always seemed to be the stronger one. People can’t imagine my struggle. But more than anyone, my struggle has been really hard. And I know how it feels to be so demotivational. But then you have to inject positivity into your life. And you have to believe in something!! You have to! Your reality is your own creation. I refuse to think negatively, to think that I can’t!

There are many things more I can say, many more theories, quotes, metaphors, analogies I can present so you can understand. But then I guess I have said enough. I actually didnt want to say anything anymore. But my conscience kept nagging me so I had to say it one more time. You are your own person. You make your own decision and take responsility for it. You have to do this on your own. Whatever you decide, we will be supportive. Stand on giant shoulders. Learn from people. This is the very essence of my experience and my learning so far. And if I dont tell you, I feel it eating at my conscience. But now I have done my part, I let you figure out this by yourself

All the best to you, dear