#GamerGate, It’s Time to Split the Hashtag!

(It’s GamerGate Time)

#GamerGate is going on it’s 6 months; it has sprang to life, learned how to walk, ride a bike, and before we know it, It might even start dating that boy next door (his father owns a boat, let’s not ruin this). And now that it’s starting to reach it’s Kindergarten years* we need to think of the future of our precious hashtag.

Now, we've been through the roller-coaster ride of highs and lows. We've faced dire odds, we changed policies, increased ethical awareness, downvoted a video. Ya’know, noteworthy things. But even with all the good, there lies a permeating aura of dissatisfaction and unrest. Everyone is starting to have different opinions! I’m not even sure when that started, but it’s becoming more and more apparent!

As it currently stands there is a lot of infighting and attempts to split the hashtag and you know what, that’s precisely what we’ll do!

Like the ‘Judgement of Solomon’ before us, someone pick the head — I’ll go for the feet — ‘cuz I always go down kicking.

The Solution is pretty simple.

Now, you, random #GamerGate reader (or if you’re not, pretend you are one) let us say you have a set of opinions that’s different than say….’#GamerGate B’s. Instead of talking it out and settling difference or just accept your stances and getting over it, Assert your dominance and create a brand new sub-Hashtag!….but sub-Hashtags need names with a powerful meaning,…more creative than adding + or Neutral…..

My Solution is Power Rangers**.

https://pmcvariety.files.wordpress.com/2013/10/mighty-morphin-power-rangers.jpg?w=670&h=377&crop=1

I mean, it all makes sense if you think about it! Power Rangers and #Gamergate have many things in common. We’re both a rebellious crew made of somewhat unpopular over-achievers of various ethnic backdrops that fit stereotypically into coloured uniforms. We all fight the Rita Repulsas of the world (I mean, like, evil-doers bent on corruption, not ‘cuz they are repulsive or anything >_>). And lastly, we both have our own giant mechanical robotic animal we call upon whenever we get into trouble.

Thus ‘#GamerGate A’s group decides to split because they want to separate the bad name of #GamerGate from misogyny, now they have a myriad of wonderful names to choose from. ‘#GamerGate A’ is now #GamerGateMysticForce. See how easy that is!

Suddenly,…that isn't enough and more people have different opinions and different ideas of the end goals! Some want to attack the Repulsas, Some want to order more pizza for their ilk, and on and on…….now we have:

#GamerGateNinjaStorm

#GamerGateDinoCharge

#GamerGateZeo

Suddenly there are too many #GamerGate’s to keep track of! How can we possibly manage the sudden spreading of the hashtag! Well…we appoint Zordons of course!

http://img4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20070523185447/powerrangers/images/6/62/Zordon.jpg

Zordons will be voted in amungst the Groups, they should be well-liked and well-versed members from the community of Twitter. There they will look for only a few integral criteria — do they stand for ethics, do they stand for bravery, are they ruggedly handsome and well suited for Floating head status?

After Choosing our appropriate Zordons for each faction of #GamerGateRangers we would then have a high council meeting where each Faction presents their happenings for discussion!

http://i.imgur.com/TxvzGkQ.jpg

The Ruggedly Handsome Zordons will then disappear behind closed door (tubes?) and decide the future of the hashtag. It will be the Council’s function to mediate and ultimately decide the course of action each #GamergateRanger uses to assert their stance!

This is all logical and in no way convoluted.

So….in closing. Why bother keeping our hashtag to a large solidarity — where we can easily spread news and rally support? A single hashtag where ideas can be easily discussed between individuals and signs of strength can be found within the heat of accusations? Why stay one solid strong foundation when we could break ourselves up into tiny little factions of power rangers that would work in separate and unsteady causes?

Well I don’t know about you #Gamergate, but I think

IT’S MORPHING TIME!

Paid for by Bandai Namco****

@micromonics

annotations

* = hashtags age much faster due to internet time.

**= I always considered myself the White Power Ranger***

*** = OH SHIT, I JUST noticed how racist that is….’White Power’ ranger….good lord Tommy!

**** = at least i’m still waiting for the check….anytime now Namco ☹

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