Embracing Truth

How do I write this?

Usually, I’m not stuck for words.

If I’m honest, I’m probably still reluctant to search for them.

You know how some people “struggle” to find their life purpose?

Well, I’ve found mine. But I’m still working out how to integrate it and, if I’m working it out, I’m probably still resisting it at some level.

I’m reminded when I p*ss about that my role here, first and foremost, is as a healer. There are lots of us around the globe, each doing our bit, in various roles, in our own way. My ‘thing’ is business and spirituality.

Perfect example was yesterday. I was being interviewed for a radio show called Femanna. The host Lisa Meisels was great. I sent my bio and the subject I was going to speak about, which is using our head, heart and gut brains, i.e. mBraining.

Before the interview, I’d asked for Divine assistance. During the interview, Lisa detected a change in my voice quality; and 15 minutes in, the technology failed. We were on Skype and the sound quality was too poor to continue.

We tried a couple more times, before I suggested that this wasn’t the talk I was supposed to give. I suggested I should talk about my own path, reaching that mid-life crisis, wondering what life was all about, and how that journey led me to become a healer. We ran with the title, “The Reluctant Healer” unscripted, unrehearsed and not only did we not encounter any technical hiccups, in terms of audience design, it was more suited to Femanna’s listeners.

I now know that I will be taking this message on tour. In my mind, it was speaking engagements about my healing journey; about how the way we perceive our environments, our thoughts and emotions create dis-ease in our bodies. Since the weekend, I realise that the message is much more spiritual in nature. About how we, as a society, globally, have become disconnected.

The message is for people who, like me, perhaps weren’t raised religious. Who feel as though something is missing from their lives; disconnected, out of alignment, with no church, as such, to turn to.

Spreading the word of God, as in Consciousness, not as in religion (any religious references I receive, I’m clueless; I’ve got to jump on Wikipedia to decode!).

There… I’ve said it. Publicly. Others such as Rupert Sheldrake, Bruce Lipton and Gregg Braden have traversed the God Science paradigm shift. I’m certainly no scientist, nor a big hitter like them. Nonetheless, I am tasked with sharing what I have been given.

What’s interesting is that when I have braved sharing parts of my history with others who help people heal, they have resonated with my words. That included having no memories before the age of 4 years old — it’s as if I didn’t exist.

I’d also forgotten that as a child, I would pray religiously, every night. I was obsessed with the fact that I had been born in Revelation. I was scared that we were running out of time. There wouldn’t be enough time for me to grow up. I didn’t want to grow up, and Peter Pan became my hero.

As an adult, my obsession with time, trying to stall time, p*ssed people off. I learned NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) and shifted my behaviour. But now I know it’s time. Time to do what I came to do. I realise some people may think I’m mad and that’s ok. As one woman said to me recently, “I don’t know whether you’re mad or brilliant.” (I smiled, since learning Human Design, I’ve come to expect that, given that I have the 43/23 genius to freak channel in my birth chart).

So, while the jury’s out, as to whether I’m a genius or a freak — it’s the former, by the way — I’m steering clear of my doctor.

I know people may not be interested in reading about me, but within these posts you may see something that resonates with some aspect of your life. If that helps one person, then it’s worth sharing my story.