Tears and goodbye

wondering

Can be read in my eyes the sorrow of being powerless. Can’t love, can’t dream. The strength escaped from my body. The enthusiastic mood just ended. With bloody painful tears think about what I can do. Nothing… Mother, I cannot be with you till the end because I’m leaving the first. I’m so sorry! I cannot imagine the events that you have to go through without me. With bloody tears, drooping head, deep grief consumes me from the inside. Even if I want to live! I gather no conditions to live. My physical and mental health is weak. I cannot imagine more shackled than I am right now. I’m so sorry! So many years of sacrifice, choosing not to circumvent the system and fell victim of the system. Governments do not need us. The many to dying the better for them all. With bitterness I realize, how vain it was, going to work day after day, just to dye helpless.

The sky is no longer starry, the sun stopped shining. The day’s go on gray. I paint lamps to see some light. I cannot envision but shadows. Goodbye!

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