In the prison of perfection,
Fear is the warden
And oh how she takes her job seriously!
Even in this circumference spelt out by perfection,
Every way I turn seems to be the wrong one,
Every decision seems to take me farther down the wrong path. 
I try to get to the exit,
But the warden is alert.
Fear won't let me leave,
The ugly scowl on her face sends shivers down my spine,
And somehow I'm convinced mediocrity isn't so bad.
It's okay to settle I think, 
Choose your fights wisely the sages have said after all,
Because you really can't win them all.
Perhaps this battle is one of such.
Why bother?!
Perfection has given you a circumference in which you can frolic,
And perhaps if you showed some gratitude,
You'd see it's not so bad after all.

So I try to settle into and snuggle in my cell,
But my mind envisages something much bigger,
And will settle for no less.
So I began to choke on my thoughts.
I'm now scared of spending time with me.
I'm running from my mind but then,
How far can I really run?
Then I remember, 
I remember whose I am and who I am.
What about the promises left me?!
The promise of wisdom?
The promise of divine direction?
The assurance of a safe landing?
That regardless the battles I lose,
The war has been won.
And no matter how gruesome it looks,
Victory is mine.

So I turn and with warden I try to converse.
But fear would not be negotiated with.
No! She must be defied
And fight her I will!
With weapons far greater than swords and spears
Sharpened in the celestial,
Fashioned for my benefit.
And since the son of God has set me free,
I'm free indeed.
I take back my life from perfection and her ally.
I will not be held bound!
I will not be contained!

Nengi Goodman

Show your support

Clapping shows how much you appreciated Nengi Goodman’s story.