Set your OWN goals!
Sure its important to try to satisfy your close ones as parents, partners and kids, but lets take a look what happens when you fail…initially because the goal you are chasing wasn’t really your idea. Try to imagine yourself back in your teenage phase…
If you are anything like me then you were probably thinking how anything is possible, you just need to wish for it strong enough (yes I was a big time dreamer!). All this availability and sense of ability to achieve whatever there is that I longed for has actually directed me from being strongly optimistic to having a huge lack of focus. Meaning I wanted sooo many things that I allowed myself believe that all of them are reachable even if I wouldn’t make any special effort, some of it will evolve and realize and it will be good enough for me at least. I repeat that was a teenage me opinion…Now I go back to emphasizing- if it was any of those goals and wishes I had for future me that would have come true I WOULD PROBABLY BE SATISFIED WITH IT. Sadly a young mind is not able to think about what would make happy my (than future) partner, children and even future ME AS A DAUGHTER, PARTNER AND MOM that is something that never crossed my mind…Did I try to make my parents proud? Yes. Did I lose focus? Yes. Were there to many goals? Definetly yes. Were they achievable? Sure. Did I reconsider them to extent of knowing the path to realization? No… See my point? I didn’t achieve any of them because: they weren’t MY GOALS TO BEGIN WITH they were all perfect to hear and read about but weren’t my true passion.
The more I remember the more it is clear that at least a half of my goals were alligned with wishes of my parents. Not a big shock I know…but it is interesting how people don’t make that special effort when they at least consciously not see that significant own pleasure in the outcome. Therefore many of “our” goals remain to stay unrealized.
This first ever published peace coming from my deepest thoughts is dedicated to motivate anyone reading it that thinking from YOUR inner child and remembering what really satisfies YOU and what makes YOU happy not trying to adjust it to other peoples wishes IS A NUMBER ONE RULE WHEN considering what your goals are.
Second but not less important than first is SETTING GOALS THAT ARE REACHABLE. Even though sometimes it seems anything is possible it is good to be realistic. Discovering if something is reachable is also a way of getting familiar to the path that leads to it.
If you start to wander and lose focus an everlasting rule is simple — DON’T LOSE FOCUS. When you find a thing that just feels right and perfect do not let yourself to switch to a comfortable zone and lazy mood swings that can last too long to be able to come back to the initial drive. Whenever the first two rules are in allignement and to some extent form a starter pack for creating a plan for your future the third rule is more of an important task to follow and take on a daily basis so it takes a lot more time and effort than it may seem at first.
Perhaps it makes sense to some off you or not…I respect everyones opinion and criticism but I really find this article as a how to manual for me as well. I am not a teenager anymore but I do feel like I have set some new goals in my life that are reachable, that make me happy and for that reason I will not lose focus this time… Starting with this peace… Its the one promise that matters the most — A PROMISE TO MYSELF.