INTERFAITH ANAND-KARAJ DEBATE:
A discussion I had with a cultural-Sikh (someone who identifies as a Sikh, yet is personally agnostic) regarding the controversial topic of interfaith Anand-Karaj marriage-ceremonies. My contributions are in italics.
In my personal opinion, interfaith-marriages should be allowed at Gurdwaras. Banning non Sikhs from Anand-Karaj will do more harm than good. The majority of Sikhs are ‘cultural-Sikhs’, who are not very religious. They are very likely to marry out of Sikhism. It is all about damage-limitation. If you prevent them from Anand-Karaj, they will feel rejected by their community. They will have no desire whatsoever to raise their kids as Sikhs. The Sikh population will shrink, as you will have lost the middle-ground; the same happened to the Zoroastrians. This is just my personal opinion.
That is fine. I have no problem whatsoever with your view. I know there is difference of opinion. I respect that, but you have just proved my point.
How?
We are not objecting to it being inside a Gurdwara, we are objecting to this specific ceremony.
People want the whole package. If they feel they are being rejected from an Anand-Karaj in particular, they would feel excluded. Do you feel that it would decrease the Sikh population — yes or no?
I do not support physical intervention, by the way, nor do I want it banned by law. It is kind-of like a non-Jewish person getting a Bar-Mitzvah. It is just extremely inappropriate with what the ceremony entails, and all that.
Bar-Mitzvah is something completely different; why would a non-Jewish person want to have a Bar-Mitzvah? Marriage, on the other hand, is something mutual, as people want to feel included together.
That is kind-of my logic. Why would a non-Sikh want an Anand-Karaj when they could easily have an alternative arrangement in the Gurdwara if they so wished? There would be no protests, no controversy. They could have a blessing, they could have an Ardass, they could have Langar and tea, and they could sign the contract. Again, I do not support physically intervening at all, by the way, but it just does not make sense to me. It is not like I want it to be a criminal-offense or anything; I just disapprove of it, that is all.
Because they would want to feel included, and perhaps by allowing for an Anand-Karaj, they may feel more inclined into becoming a Sikh. Forget about the non-Sikh for a second. What about the Sikh in this case? How would they feel?
The ceremony kind of carries a religious significance to it and this diminishes it, in my opinion.
Yes, but it is diminished every day, when people cut their beards, and then drink shortly afterwards at a wedding-reception. (In reference to the Sunday-Morning-Live programme on October-18th, 2015) The Jewish woman had a good point. The Jewish community has grown through interfaith-marriage, not declined.
I did not understand her point. Was she saying Sikhism was born out of hatred for Hinduism?
No, she was saying Sikhism was born out of the hatred of inequality in Hindu culture. I think she was referring to the caste-system.
Again, I am not against interfaith marriage. I just believe that with the Anand-Karaj in particular, traditions should be observed, as you are in the presence of Guru-Sahib.
From a literalist point-of-view, only Amritdharis can have an Anand-Karaj.
That is not true; it is anyone who accepts Guru-Sahib as their supreme spiritual guide and master.
Do you agree that it can put people off Sikhism?
The actions of the protestors definitely can, yes. That is why I am against physically intervening. If it goes ahead, they (the protesters) should let it go ahead unencumbered and then speak to the Gurdwara, afterwards.
Look, it is complicated; but believe me, it will do much more harm than good. Sixty-percent to seventy-percent of the Sikh community are secular. They are very liberal-minded, and chances are, they will find someone who is a non-Sikh. If we are against them having an Anand-Karaj, then they will feel excluded. We will lose that sixty to seventy percent, and the population would plummet in a few generations. To me, it is a case of damage-limitation.
It is complicated, very complicated. You have a valid point, but I am worried about our traditions becoming diluted.
They would not. Jewish people have survived two-thousand years of interfaith-marriage and their population is growing. On the other hand, the Zoroastrian community has plummeted, as a result of its hostility to interfaith.
A Gurdwara does not reject anyone. Guru-Sahib never rejects anyone. But can you understand why it is a bit strange to have an avowed atheist or Christian, for instance, who obviously rejects Guru-Sahib (they have the right to do so, this does not make them a bad or immoral person), participate in this ceremony? The Anand-Karaj requires the partners to circumambulate Guru-Sahib and then prostrate towards him as an expression of reverence and subordination. So then essentially, it becomes meaningless. That is my point. Are we then going to say that the Anand-Karaj itself is discriminatory and it should be changed to accommodate non-Sikhs?
Well, by that logic, it has already become meaningless. Do you think all of those drinkers and alcoholics who marry in an Anand-Karaj really have that reverence to the SGGSJ? So in your opinion only conservative Sikhs should do the Anand-Karaj.
The Anand-Karaj is particularly sensitive because it is in the presence of Guru-Sahib, is what I am saying.
So, in your opinion, only conservative Sikhs should do the Anand-Karaj, if it is so sensitive?
I am saying it should be for people who understand, despite their sins, that Guru-Sahib is their rightful master. At the very least, they (the non-Sikh partner) should be open-minded about things. If they are avowedly non-Sikh, then it does not make any sense. And again, I do not think it is fair to ruin somebody’s wedding-day. I think we should take it up with the negligent Gurdwara committees afterwards, if anything. I have never supported ruining somebody’s wedding-day.
I know you have not — I am fully aware of that.
I understand your points, by the way, and you have given me a lot to think about.
I’m glad that I have given you a lot to think about.
GLOSSARY:
· Guru-Sahib (“goo-roo-saa-hib”): a honorific term for the Guru-Granth-Sahib, the holy text of Sikhism. Considered to be living embodiment of the Guru by Sikhs
· Amritdhari (“um-rut-daar-ee”): an orthodox, practising, baptised Sikh; one who adopts the five primary articles of faith and who adheres to the standardised code-of-conduct for Sikhs
· Anand-Karaj (“uh-nunned-car-rej”): the traditional Sikh marriage ceremony, which accompanies the traditional circumambulation (Laavan) of Guru -Sahib as an expression of devotion and worship
