How To Overcome Your Greatest Fears
From being afraid of speaking in public to getting anxious about the future, fears are a part of our life, another bump in the road that we have to overcome. Some people can get stagnated at some point in their lives because they are afraid of something that is keeping them from succeeding. If this is your case, I have a small guide to help you get rid of any fear that is holding your back.
I have seen many cases where people will rather be afraid their whole lives before admitting to anyone that they fear a thing or two. Our society has always told us stories about amazing heroes that fear nothing and fight with bravery, so it’s normal to feel insecure about having fears.
But real life is a little bit more complicated than that and not all of us can be like the heroes in the movies. If you’re reading this article, this means you are heading in the right direction. Accepting that there is something bothering you and starting to seek help is what everyone should do. This is your first step towards becoming as brave as any hero in the movies.
Throughout time I have gathered some tips to build a small guide that I always recommend to people having a bit of a struggle to overcome a certain fear, or fears. This guide will give you the tools to start your healing process today and live a life without fears, so keep on reading!
1. Identify it
The first and most important step is understanding and identifying your fear. I don’t mean just knowing about it, I mean really identifying it. You have to examine yourself deeply and ask yourself some personal questions. If you want to understand your fear you need to know what is causing it, when it started, how deep it is, where it originated and how it makes you act or react in certain situations.
Knowledge is power, so once you get to know your fear like the back of your hand you will be able to address it a lot more effectively and start the process to overcome it.
2. Embrace it
Once you’ve identified and have complete knowledge of your fear, it is time to accept it. We are all humans and we all have fears, flaws and troubled times.
So accept that it’s OK to be afraid. It is OK to feel scared and it is OK to have fears, don’t be too harsh on yourself as overcoming a fear is a process that takes time.
The first couple of times you face it, you will certainly feel afraid and that is nothing to be ashamed of. But as time goes by, one day you will stand against your fear and feel nothing. That day will arrive if you accept your fear as it is.
3. Imagine it
You now know your fear, you know the situations that trigger it and you have also accepted it and embraced it. Now is time for exposure. The best way to get used to a situation that makes us uncomfortable is to be exposed to it as many times as possible. Depending on the kind of fear, or fears, that you want to overcome, this step can be somehow tricky which is why I always recommend using our powerful imagination.
Every morning you can try to imagine a situation where you have to stand up to your fear and overcome it to be successful in a particular activity. Get creative and imagine different triggering episodes and different outcomes, ask yourself what could happen if you do this or that, or if you react in a certain way. This will help you to get to know different scenarios and what the possible outcomes are. When you are faced with the situation, it won’t feel as unfamiliar and you will have some sort of control.
4. Fight it
Knowing and embracing your fears will take you a long way, facing them daily with your imagination will give you the strength to stand before them and overcome them. However, sometimes in real life it will not be as easy and you can find yourself not having the success you expected.
This is just another part of the process, losing against yourself sometimes will only give you more tools to be stronger next time. So don’t be down if one day your fear is stronger than you because this is absolutely normal, sometimes you can lose a battle but the secret is to keep fighting until you finally win the war. There is nothing better to know yourself deeply than seeing and analyzing how you deal with failure.
5. Be compassionate with yourself
My final advice to you is to be kind with yourself. Try hard every day and, if you don’t get the results you expected, try harder the next day. Overcoming a fear is a learning process that will teach you a lot about yourself and your current situation in life, every failure and success that you will experience on the way will take you a step closer to the day when you will face your fear and won’t feel anything.
Don’t be disappointed if it takes longer for you than for other people, we are all different and we all go through a different process. Reach out for help if you feel that you can’t do this alone, because that is also OK and it is also normal. A personal session with a confidence coach can be the last push you need to finally overcome a fear. Sometimes a guide can show us things that are right in front of us but that we can’t see.
Whatever it is that you need to get past your fears and leave them behind, use it. Seek help, talk to friends, don’t be too harsh on yourself and face every day with a positive attitude. You will see the results with time, be patient and enjoy the ride.
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