New Year Reflections.
I used to be a New Years grinch. And then I realised actually it’s a good time to reflect and think about where you have been and where you are heading.
This time last year, I was in a real rut, I would go as far to even say I had hit rock bottom in the little life that I’ve had. But, when you have felt the low of lows it really does make you stronger and you realise that there’s nowhere but up to go. Here are 7 things I’ll be taking into 2016 with me.
1. Believe in my own ability
This time last year I would always look at other people who were doing great things and always think oh but I couldn’t do that. Oh I don’t have what it takes, I don’t have that thing. Then I very quickly realised that thing is just the willingness to learn, to be open minded and believe in your ability. Everyone who has achieved amazing things started off as a normally ordinary person. They had a vision. They dedicated their efforts to make that vision happen. Yes there are some people who may have started off with a little more money that the rest of us or a “better” education than the rest of us. But, look around and you will always find an example of someone that has less than you in all fronts, yet is achieving more. It comes down to having grit, resilience and the willingness to want to do more. I think that’s the biggest change I’ve seen in myself and it’s one that took AGES to get to.
2. Don’t take it personally
When someone makes you feel crap it’s a reflection of them
When you feel like you can’t complete a task, it’s a reflection of the fact you need to approach it differently
When you lack motivation, it’s a reflection of you lacking inspiration
I used to take shortfalls REALLY personally, if I was struggling in class I saw it as a reflection of my ability rather than a reflection of I just learn differently. But now have developed a more healthy approach. Don’t take it personally or it will eat you up.
3. Take time out
I’m a hard worker and proud. I have the ability to put in the long hard shifts, stay up till the early hours and just work 16 hours straight. But I realise more that:
- You need to take time out.
I was the sort of person that would miss birthdays and meet ups because I wanted to just work and work and not waste time. But now I realise that taking time out is an investment into myself, selfish yes but these are the selfish years for me.
2. Quality not quantity
There are days where I sit in front of my laptop and just faff. These are signs you need to take time out and come back to it.
4. Power of the mind
This is one of the things that literally has changed my life. Your perspective is your reality. The way you just think about the world will determine what you think you can and can’t do. The power of reinforcing that you are capable and you can achieve anything should not be understated. Try it. It’s things like I’ll be in the gym and I can’t lift a weight, I talk to myself and next thing you know I’m doing 8 reps of the very same weight I thought I couldn’t lift. The saying of you think you can you’re right, if you think you can’t you’re right couldn’t be truer. If you see your world full barriers and obstacles that you can’t overcome, that is your reality. If you see it as a world of opportunities for you to grab. That is your reality. Be careful what you say because your mind is listening.
5. Cut out negativity
The people around you are probably one of the key factors that will determine where you go, what you do and what you achieve. Over the past year I have been pretty ruthless in spending less time with those that send over ‘bad vibes.’ People who I felt had an ounce of negativity towards me or are emotionally draining. Vibes don’t lie, if you feel bad vibes off a person, the likelihood is that they are bad for you.
6. Be selfish with my time
I say more no’s than yes’s. My time is valuable, not in an “I’m more important than you” sort of way. But in a you need to learn to make time for yourself before making time for others. Pair that with the fact I now live on the other side of London, lots of my friends would probably call me a flake or say I don’t see them enough. But I am just more selfish with my time now. If I’ve had a long week and want to sit at home all weekend, that means I’m busy. Just because I’m not going out or meeting friends it doesn’t mean I’m not occupied. I’m occupied with relaxing and listening to my body when it is drained. It shouldn’t feel like a chore to go and meet friends. Be selective with your time and learn to enjoy your own company. Doesn’t mean I’m not the first one to help someone up, you can be selfish and selfless.
7. Talk it out
I was always someone who internalised my problems and seldom asked for help. I have now changed that. In every instance talking out a problem has helped me. Whether it helps you think it through, or come up with the solution it ALWAYS helps.
Hope everyone has a great year to come!