I Did
Today I came to the realization that it’s been about a year since the idea of moving back home to Illinois came up during conversations with my counselor and loved ones. I was blogging regularly and out of curiosity I went back to see what my state of mind was during that time. Here’s an excerpt from my 9/1/2017 post. What a difference a year makes:

It’s eye-opening to say the least!
I’m a firm believer that you’re in charge of your own happiness. You shouldn’t rely on others to make yourself happy, but with that being said, if you’re working a job that makes you miserable and are in a relationship which is unhealthy to say the least, then you’re most likely not going to find a lot of joy in life.
I was doing everything I could in order to overcome one of the deepest periods of depression of my life. I was hiking, meditating, doing yoga and Reiki, and anything else I could think of to enhance my mood, but the grip was too strong.
In the end, I was in charge of my own happiness and moving back home was the key. I’ve learned to just allow life to take me where I need to go at this point. Allowing the universe to set things into motion is a concept I’ve had to learn the hard way. Even things which seem like horrible, life altering events are blessings in disguise. Everything leads you to where you need to be. Everything is a lesson in life. If we didn’t struggle, we wouldn’t grow as humans.
I’ve had a lot of dark periods and episodes of depression, but I’ve survived 100% of them. If I would’ve given up, I wouldn’t know the happiness I have now. I wouldn’t be here to see my nieces and nephews, to enjoy all the boys ball games and golf matches, and I wouldn’t know what it’s like to be loved by and treated like an absolute queen by my best friend in the world.
Life gets better. Never take a permanent step for a temporary problem. Even if you feel like you’re unloved and alone in this world, it won’t always be that way. You’ll find your happiness. I did.
