For me, my depression doesn’t mean I feel sad all the time. I don’t lay awake at night crying, I don’t entertain suicidal thoughts. Instead, the feelings are of extreme boredom, disinterest in most things, an inability to focus on just one thing for extended periods of time. I opt to do easy things: sleep, read, poke around on the internet endlessly hour after hour. I don’t engage with anything much. I don’t go out and build new relationships with people. I don’t get terribly excited about anything, even things that I used to. Most things feel like too much effort to bother with. The experiential world is smooshed into a flat, grey, surface with no interesting details.