How to Find Meaning by Getting Over Yourself
“These alternate forms of consciousness might in spite of all the perplexity, be indispensable stages in our approach to the final fullness of the truth.” — William James
In my research on meaning and development, I keep reading about the value of self-transcendent experiences (STEs). These are experiences (also referred to as non-ordinary states of consciousness) where, for a brief moment, people feel lifted above their day-to-day concerns, their sense of self fades away and they feel connected to something bigger.
For many of us, these experiences are very few and far in between.
Yet, research shows that STEs can have a profoundly positive effect on the human psyche. Notably (to me), they are associated with higher levels of adult development (Kegan and Maslow) and living a more meaningful life (Emily Esfahani-Smith).
This means that many people who have reached higher levels of adult development (and performance) or rate their lives as ‘meaningful’ have dabbled in STEs.
Thus, while many people seek out STEs (like meditation) to feel calmer and more focused, a growing body of research shows that these states can do much more. They can actually help facilitate our development and provide us with a greater sense of meaning in our lives.
This piqued my curiosity for three reasons:
- I’m generally interested in meaning and human development, and STEs seem to be critical to both.
- We’re living longer than ever before. In the past, many people died before they could reach higher levels of adult development (since these levels are typically only reached in late adulthood). We now have the opportunity to keep exploring and expanding our consciousness and development, and STEs can help facilitate that.
- If the race is truly on between intelligence and consciousness, as Yuval Noah Harari believes, then our “competitive advantage” can only be consciousness.
While there are many ways to illicit STEs (meditation, prayer, ecstatic dancing, etc.), I’m focusing on psychedelics. This is because I’m interested and inspired by the new wave of research showing that psychedelics can not only help treat people with depression, addiction, etc. but also optimize the well-being of “healthy normals”.
Part 1 will explore self-transcendent experiences, their connection to theories of human development and meaning and what it is we’re transcending. Part 2 will describe how psychedelics facilitate self-transcendent experiences.
Self Transcendence, Meaning & Development
“Experiences of self-transcendence seem to provide some of life’s most positive and meaningful experiences, and, as [William] James claimed, may comprise some of our moments of ‘greatest peace’.” - David Yaden, The Varieties of Self-Transcendent Experience
David Yaden, a psychologist at the University of Pennsylvania and the lead author of a recent paper in the Review of General Psychology, “The Varieties of Self-Transcendent Experience,” defines STEs as “transient mental states marked by decreased self-salience and increased feelings of connectedness”.
In short, they help us transcend the boundaries of the self (the individual ego) and become a part of something larger.
Think about a particularly meaningful experience in your life. Chances are it involved a feeling of awe or connection (holding your baby in your arms, being immersed in nature, etc.) — experiences where you were ‘outside yourself’.
Indeed, many of us have experienced STEs. They exist along a spectrum of intensity that ranges from the routine (e.g., losing yourself in music or a book), to the intense and potentially transformative (e.g., feeling connected to everything and everyone, mystical experiences), to states in between, like those experienced by many people while meditating or when feeling awe.
According to William James, the great American psychologist of the 19th century, the magic of STEs lies in their “annihilational” aspect — the way they induce a feeling of self-loss.
So many of us spend so much time ruminating and worrying about problems large and small: What’s going to happen if I lose my job? What if he dumps me? I’m worthless. Nothing I do matters. How come she brushed me off?
As Yaden and his colleagues write, “When the self temporarily disappears, so too may some of these fears and anxieties.” This creates space for more positive outcomes.
Indeed, the researchers found that STEs are more often associated with well-being and prosocial behavior — and more intense STEs led people to feel more satisfied with their lives and rate their lives as more meaningful.
Here’s how STEs factor into two theories of human development (Maslow & Kegan) and some of the latest research on meaning (Emily Esfahani-Smith):
Maslow’s Pyramid of Human Needs
Most of us are familiar with Maslow’s 5-layer hierarchy of needs pyramid of human motivation. According to the model, we (healthy humans) have a certain number of needs, presented below:
However, we can only meet these needs in hierarchical order, starting with the lower-level (deficiency) needs. As lower needs are met (not entirely, just mostly so), we’re motivated to pursue and meet higher level (growth) needs, like self-actualization. In Maslow’s first model, self-actualization — the fulfillment of one’s potential — is the highest level of development.
What is less well-known is that Maslow changed this model near the end of his life. In his later thinking, Maslow argued that there is a higher level of development, which is essentially the pinnacle of human experience. He called this self-transcendence.
We achieve this level by focusing on things beyond the self like altruism, spiritual awakening, liberation from egocentricity, and the unity of being.
Here is how he put it: Transcendence refers to the very highest and most inclusive or holistic levels of human consciousness, behaving and relating, as ends rather than means, to oneself, to significant others, to human beings in general, to other species, to nature, and to the cosmos (Maslow, The Farther Reaches of Human Nature).
Kegan’s Theory of Adult Development — Stage 5
Harvard psychologist Robert Kegan spent three decades tracking a group of adults as they aged. His goal was simple: understand how they changed and grew over time, and determine if, in fact, there were upper limits to who we can become.
He discovered that adults can go through 5 distinct developmental stages (just like children). However, many adults remained frozen in time, while a select few achieved meaningful growth.
Right around middle age, for example, Kegan noticed that some people moved beyond generally well-adjusted adulthood, or what he called “Self-Authoring,” into the fifth and final stage: “Self-Transforming.”
In Stage 5 one’s sense of self is not tied to particular identities or roles, but is constantly created through the exploration of one’s identities and roles and further honed through interactions with others. Self-transforming is the developmental stage we tend to associate with wisdom. Yet, Kegan found that fewer than 5 percent of adults reaching Stage 5.
He also found that a disproportionate number of these Stage 5 adults had dabbled in self-transcendent experiences: often beginning with psychedelics and, after that, making meditation, martial arts, and other state-shifting practices a central part of their lives.
Many of them described their frequent access to self-transcendent states as the “turbo-button” for their development, leading Kegan to state that transitioning to Stage 5 requires self-transcendence: where the self transcends its boundaries and becomes part of something larger.
Emily Esfahani Smith’s Pillars of Meaning (research on meaning)
To find out how people can live more meaningful lives, journalist Emily Esfahani Smith spent five years interviewing hundreds of people and sorted through psychology, neuroscience and philosophy research.
In her research, she found four common themes (pillars) to a meaningful life: Purpose, Belonging, Storytelling and Transcendence. People who rated their lives as meaningful tended to have dabbled in STEs.
So what’s the deal? Why is transcendence such a critical component of meaning and human development?
But first, what are we transcending?
Before I can answer these questions, I’ll explore what it is that we’re transcending. FYI — much of this section is taken from Steven Kotler and Jamie Wheal’s excellent book: Stealing Fire: How Silicon Valley, the Navy SEALs, and Maverick Scientists Are Revolutionizing the Way We Live and Work.
Let’s start with normal consciousness. We all have a base level, “‘normal” waking consciousness that refers to the state of consciousness in which we are awake, alert and aware of our thoughts, feelings, sensations and our environment.
Most of us spend about two-thirds of the day in normal waking consciousness — while you’re reading his article, bike riding, or talking to a friend — while the other third is usually spent asleep.
If you pay attention to your normal consciousness — the thoughts and feelings you have during the day — you’ll notice:
- They’re ego-dominated: Your thoughts and actions are largely influenced by your ego (the ‘inner self’) — which has a strong need/desire to constantly assert and defend itself and cover its weaknesses.
- There’s always an inner critic: You have a nagging inner ‘Woody Allen’ critic who is constantly self-monitoring, judging, doubting and criticizing.
- They’re sharp: You have a heightened state of alertness, logic and critical reasoning
- They’re stressed: You experience stress, anxiety or restlessness throughout the day
These are general characteristics of 21st century ‘normal’ consciousness. And they are largely the result of the following brain activity:
- Hyperactive Prefrontal Cortex
- Heightened Beta Brainwaves
- Steady Drip of Cortisol
Ok, so our normal state of consciousness is far from ideal.
Moreover, we’re actually encouraged to alter our consciousness all the time. These are called “state-sanctioned states of consciousness” — non-ordinary states of consciousness that are actually encouraged by cultures and states and are accompanied by norms and laws to promote and support them.
For example, we live in a market-driven economy that relies on happy, awake, alert workers who can work as hard as they can, have a break, wind down, and then do it all over again.
Examples of 21st century ‘state sanctioned states of consciousness’ include:
- Awake, Alert, Hard-Working — Coffee Break, Smoke Break
- Wind-Down and Begin Again — Happy Hour
- Happy — Prozak, Zoloft
Because these states are deemed not only necessary but encouraged — these consciousness-altering techniques are legalized.
I’m bringing this up because it’s important to understand that we’re not living (or thinking) in a vacuum.
There is no neutral consciousness baseline. Our normal consciousness is characterized by ego, neuroticism, and stress. Moreover, it’s being heavily influenced (and altered) by the society and culture we live in, all the time. Yes, it helps us to think logically (sometimes) about interesting problems, hang out with friends, cook a nice dinner, etc. But it also generates anxiety, insecurity, and fear, regularly.
As Michael Pollan writes, “my ego is one of a couple of characters in my mind, and not always the best. The ego is very important — the ego got the book written. But it’s also what punishes us, what keeps us locked in our grooves of thought, and it’s what defends us against the world and against our own consciousness.”
Once you understand these things, the value of transcending this ‘normal consciousness’ becomes clearer.
What’s interesting to me is how our most meaningful moments are the ones in which we tune down our ‘self’ and connect to something bigger. This is significantly at odds with a society and culture that places such a high value on the individual. With so much self-focus (self-love, self-esteem, self-improvement), it’s no wonder it’s so hard for us to create and cultivate meaning in our lives.
Disclaimer: I am not condoning the use of psychedelics, I’m merely interested in the power of self-transcendent experiences in general, and psychedelics in particular, to optimize our consciousness and contribute to meaning and human development. On that note, it’s also important to say that there can be very clear negative outcomes to ego-dissolution. I am only focusing on the positive ones.
What’s next?
Part 1 explored self-transcendent experiences, their relationship to theories of human development and research on meaning, and normal consciousness (what it is that we’re transcending).
Stay tuned for Part 2 (out next week!) to learn how psychedelics can help facilitate STEs.
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