More often than not a parent dream is to see their child always be on the top — come first in everything. The pressure we put on our children to perform starts to dictate how they perceive life.

A child feels very disillusioned when they do not come first, as they feel that they have not lined upto their parent expectations. Children become negatively competition and start to use any means on methods to come first.

As a result, many of times, those who are always racing to be on the top of the game lose out on friendship in close and strong bondages. They do not want to share their notes, they keep to themselves.

They had to look down upon other classmates who do not perform well. They avoid extracurricular activities as they feel that taking then away from their performance.

The importance of coming first slowly becomes so ignored in the child that they starts to feel high or low on their self esteem based on their performance. This slowly leads to their success or dissatisfactions later as they enter the work fields. They become more competitive at work that it leads to their overall dissatisfaction in life from everything.

Competitive kids tend to be more critical of other, cynical, dissatisfied and easily prone to depression.

As a parent it is our primary duty and responsibility to raise emotionally healthy children. We should encourage our kids to always participate in everything and that spirit should be applauded rather than the winning!

This will seed the thought in the child that winning is great but not important. It’s the spirit of participation, completion and team spirit that is important.

Children should be talked to and not screamed at discuss their performance. If you are not happy with it — understand why they did not perform well and take action to help them improve.

Show them that you care about them and not just their achievement.

Don’t put you ambitions on them. Let them decide what they want to do and how they want to do it. Be an enabler to them and help them be happy, emotionally wealthy ethical and humble individuals.

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