7 Reasons Why You Can’t Get Over ‘The One That Got Away’

Yes, it sounds cheesy. But almost everyone has that one person who will always be special to them. Someone they lost, someone they couldn’t have or someone they simply had bad timing with. And while it can feel like there are a thousand reasons to hang onto your past love, it’s probably one of seven:

  1. You want what you can’t have
    It’s a cliché for a reason (which is also a cliché but… you get it). Being in love with someone who is out of reach is, for some reason, a thrill. But think about this: Would you still be after them if you knew you could have them? Are you really, truly interested in rekindling whatever relationship you had? Could you see yourself being with them in everyday life? If the answer is no, maybe it is just a safe little dream you like having because you know it has no chance of becoming reality anyway.
  2. You’re projecting more onto them than they actually are
    Maybe you’re right, and the person you’re thinking of really is perfect for you. Or maybe you just wish they were, which is why you choose to only remember the good things about them. The looks, the laughs, the great moments you shared. Try to consider the downside of things — you might change your mind.
  3. You’re missing a piece of yourself
    Is it them you’re missing or is it the way you used to feel when you were around them? Possibly even the way you were before you changed (hey, we all do). Hanging onto the past might be holding you back from accepting who you are today. Letting go is scary… but sometimes necessary.
  4. Daydreaming is easier than moving on
    Sure, it’s nice to think about the memories you’ve made. Sweet, amazing — life-changing, maybe. The reason you love dreaming about your ‘One That Got Away’ might be because it’s easier than moving on. The sad thing is, as long as you’re dwelling on the past, you’re missing out on what’s right in front of you. As the fabulous (and very wise) Take That put it: You can look back but don’t stare.
  5. The unanswered questions
    Forgetting the ‘One That Got Away’ is tough — and even more so if you haven’t had any closure. What went wrong? If you had done something differently, would it have changed things? Was it bad timing or was it just not meant to be? If there’s any chance for you to get those answers, take it. So you can finally understand and get past it.
  6. You think it’s your only shot
    At the risk of sounding a little like Dr. Phil here: Do you suffer from low self-esteem? There’s a chance you’re still hooked on your former love because you secretly think of them as the only shot you had. Maybe you’re scared that if you let go, you’ll have to find someone else, open up to them and possibly even get hurt. Again.
  7. It’s Love
    Capital L. Your feelings might still be there because they’re so monumental they cannot be ignored. What if your ‘One That Got Away’ thinks of you as their ‘One That Got Away’, too? (Yes, this sounds less like real life and more like the stuff RomComs are made of but they have to get their ideas from somewhere, right?) Who knows, your one true love might be sitting at home thinking about you and you wouldn’t even know. Give them a call, write a letter, find out what they’re up to (in a non-creepy way). It might be worth it.
    Chances are: If it’s still on your mind, it matters.