Photo by Oladimeji Odunsi on Unsplash

There I was, a 21-year-old girl who nursed an unhealthy desire to be light-skinned, because I subconsciously assumed ‘lighter’ meant prettier.

I had just caught my reflection after an emotional breakdown and loathed what I saw. The day before, I’d returned home from university feeling distraught; my melanin came back with infuriating vengeance and this time it introduced discolouration. It was my fault; in a bid to keep my black at bay, I desperately spent all my money on a brightening cream that I subsequently couldn’t afford. Maybe being broke was a blessing in disguise.

The skincare ‘specialist’ tried to…

Photo by Lindsey LaMont on Unsplash

My earliest engagement in a feminist-centric argument as a teenager was far from perfect. All I possessed was a feisty nature, smart mouth, zero patience and the boldness of a thousand Amazonians.

I recollect it was one of those nights I spent lying on my dad’s car, staring at the stars. As usual, I envisioned the night going as planned, but trouble soon found me in the form of my neighbour who I didn’t particularly fancy.

Most of what happened that night is a haze; all I remember was the rage I felt and the words that fell from my…

Image by Stefan Keller from Pixabay

Last week, a culmination of emotions ruptured inside me, and I lost control. I cried, screamed, experienced multiple anxiety attacks and fought to suppress the weight of pain that kept me in a state of mental limbo.

The past few weeks have been chaotic in the world; from racial-inspired killings and targeted police brutality in the US to terrorism, rape and murder of young women in Nigeria. It seems like hamsters, we are stuck in a spinning wheel of unfortunate events that have us gasping for real change. And I am exhausted.

I am majorly exhausted to think that in…

Photo by Reza Hasannia on Unsplash

A few days ago, I found out my friend nearly killed himself. You probably glazed through that sentence casually and I don’t blame you. Most of us are guilty of ignoring information that we have no direct emotional attachment to. But, this is my friend; I’m bound by choice to care.

He didn’t call to announce that he would have been dead a year ago, even though I wish he was that direct and unashamed about it. He only got bold to share his experience after I shared mine. …

A note to my younger self:

I know right now, your life doesn’t seem perfect and you may not have it all figured out, but who puts a timer on these things, anyway? I know you spend your time on Instagram coveting the seemingly perfect lives of girls your age but it doesn’t matter because it’s mostly an illusion. I’ve seen the struggle that happens behind-the-scenes and everyone has a story similar to yours or much worse.
Take your time to figure your life out because there are enough lessons to be learnt. And not knowing what’s next is part…

Ngozi Ufere

I share my dynamic life’s journey and experiences. It’s mostly feminism and mental health, but there’s a bit of something else.

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