Be uncomfortable
Today, as I was browsing through twitter, I came across this tweet from Sam Altman.
One read of his statement and the Hacker News comment he has mentioned, and I was instantaneously reminded of this post that I wrote sometime ago.
Today I happened to converse with an old acquaintance, the last time I talked to her was probably a decade ago. Barring some initial awkwardness, the conversation steered in the direction of work and our lives in general. Those 20 minutes felt like a lifetime! She couldn’t stop talking about the work opportunities she never got, the second education degree she wanted but never applied for, the business she wanted to start but never did, and so on. For a while, it seemed like everything in her life was going wrong, and I sympathised for as long as I could. Then the conversation reached a point where I started asking questions so that I could help her in whatever way was possible; and to my surprise, I found out that I couldn’t. Because she didn’t want to.
For a while, I reasoned that there must be specific problems in each case that she’d had to overcome, but I figured that most of the problems existed in her attitude towards her life goals. She wanted to get into that new project at her office but wouldn’t apply for it because she assumed her current boss would not let go; may be her boss wouldn’t, maybe he would. She didn’t apply for the 2nd degree because she felt her age of learning was gone past and that everyone in her social circle had already had their MBAs and MTechs and MSes by now.
It is funny and sad at the same time, how only a few of us are willing to step out of our comfort zones, yet we all want a better outcome, a better profile, a better life.
We hate being uncomfortable, but our unwillingness to take risks, to be ashamed and bruised and our steadfast hold on security is what stops these betterments.
More than five years ago, I decided to quit my job and start a tech business. It was an uncomfortable decision, something I had never done before. During these five years, I had to do whatever it took for the business to function. I was not in a managerial position, but a survivor’s. Legal was uncomfortable to understand, but without understanding it the company would be at risk and I wouldn’t even get to know. Being a tech person, sales was even more uncomfortable to get into, but it was the one of the most critical cogs that drove the entire wheel.
Earlier in 2017, we (along with all our investors and advisors) decided to shut down Cardback. It was the most uncomfortable decision I had to make.
The journey has helped me grow personally and professionally. I cannot recognise the 2012 Nidhi anymore, nor can I see her making the decisions I get to make today. And I realize it now that it is this discomfort which has shaped my personality and my career.
This does not in any way indicate that the only way to step out of your comfort zone is by starting a business on your own. We have entrepreneurs and intrapreneurs everywhere else we look. I have examples of people who switched their 25 yr long careers to a completely different domain, excited about the new challenges and the role they get to play. I have friends who make the plunge from one company to another, completely changing their work profiles as they do so, but unmindful of the old resume building process; while a few others have made their way from corporate jobs to independent travel experts. The change in the personalities of such people and the confidence they exude is a testament to the amount of growth they have experienced as a part of their work challenges.
As the HN comment mentions above,
Most people want to be comfortable, not ‘successful’ in a way that requires ambition. But many people are brainwashed enough by the rhetoric of success that they don’t realize it’s not what they want.
Breaking off from this comfort, is precisely what will change the outcomes that one desires.
You don’t have to settle for what you are, you get to create who you want to become.
These bunch of quotes are a mere drop of inspiration, to pick the less traveled path, to do something slightly reckless. You’ll thank yourself years later for that one decision every time.
Originally published on November 30, 2017 at www.facebook.com and updated on February 1, 2019
