Matter At Hand

As I lay here watching the late afternoon sun dapple the concrete on my patio it transforms into a mesmerizing light show of dark shadows and sunlight competing for space. My energy is slowly draining from me. The light breeze teases the wind chime to play its tune in competition with the parrots squawking in the large black olive tree just outside the gate.

My eyes fight to stay open. I’m trying but it’s so hard. I don’t think I will be able to win this battle. While there is a slight breeze the air is hot and as the sun makes its way through the sky the heat is becoming uncomfortable. My arm slips off of the chair and my hand dangles close to the ground. The cat keeps prancing by, she moves like a ballerina, her little paws purposefully moving her closer to my hand. She presses her head and then her body against my hand but not getting the usual attention she slinks away with one disdainful glance back.

Breathing is slow and steady. I can feel my diaphragm expand with each pull of air. Reminds me of something I read once about mindful breathing to relax. I am so relaxed which is unusual because how can I be? I’m laying here energy ebbing from me, arm dangling on a Sunday afternoon. No one is home and that is even more rare than me laying here.

Every once in awhile the dog gives out an annoying bark/howl and pulls me out of this blissful state I find myself sinking into. She is really starting to get on my nerves. I wonder if she is hungry or just wants my attention. She won’t be getting fed or my attention any time soon. I hope she stops soon so I can get back to the matter at hand.

It’s not as bright as before. the sun has continued its trip across the sky and a few dark clouds have blown in. At least that is what my mind is telling me. You see, I lost that battle of keeping my eyes opened. Not completely gone I still have my other senses. The smell of a neighbor firing up the grill for a family BBQ, someone is raking leaves I hear the scratching of the rake. The breeze has kept me company all this time and I feel it lightly touch my skin and move the wisps of my hair onto my face. My mouth is dry and I could really use a sip of cold water. It seems lately water is the only thing that can quench my thirst.

We all die and each day we live we are one more day closer. But not today! Today I will get back to the matter at hand and enjoy my very rare and special late afternoon nap.