As i finally seem to get comfortable on the couch. After cleaning up after lunch its only noon but i am exhausted. My 4 month old is finally alright with being sat down and my 2 year old is playing with her toys. I cant help but feel sucked dry day after day. See i still breastfeed both of my children. Though i enjoy looking down at my 2 year olds sweet face as she drifts off into a peacful sleep, i know this will be coming to a end soon . I have been trying to get my sweet toddler to stop breastfeeding. She has grown to expect it everytime i sit down or dont have her sister in my arms. She has started throwing horrible tantrums if i deny her the breast. It breaks my heart knowing that this simple task that comferts her so much will be taken away from her. It hurts me knowing that these sweet bonding moments will come to an end. Two years of beautiful moments almost finished. My heart is breaking my baby will now be a toddler. She will never get up on my lap and pull at my shirt knowing that there is instant comfort only inches away. My sweet love ,my first child. Made such a scary thing to a first time mom so peacfull and easy.