Consciously Thriving: The Blueprint Advice to Millennials
Beginning to learn how to handle life as an adult is particularly hard when no one ever fucking taught us
I believe in getting instant results that work as a catalyst to drive lasting change- and get people feeling good about life. We have it wrong, and have had it wrong long enough for us to be directly affected by it. Have you ever felt something is keeping you from your next step, even more, holding you in one spot? When you go about your day, do you question why this happens to you? That’s the adversity talking- the mental block that comes in many forms. We’ve been programmed to respond with behavior that cripples our growth. The fact that adversity exists is not the issue, but the fact that you beat yourself up when you experience it is. We need to overcome these walls not by pushing back against them, but by making them disappear completely.
1. Know Thyself
As much time as we allocate(or promise ourselves) to “work on ourselves,” we usually fall short of our desired outcomes. The first reason usually being that we never took time to fix ourselves on a compelling future. The breakthrough you’re looking for is a single moment in time, it comes as quick as you let it. By understanding who you are, you are going to better vet yourself against the times when those walls feel the strongest. Our story, how we talk to ourselves and the questions we ask, is what dictates how strong or weak this push feels. Think about it, when you ask yourself “why do bad things always happen to me?” How confident are you in that moment that you can overcome whatever it is you’re facing? To be blunt, it’s almost impossible. Self monitor how you speak to yourself for an entire day, and log your results. If you feel like you’re constantly losing the battle, it’s only because you speak to yourself that way.
Side Note * 80% of who you are is accounted from the 20% of people you are the greatest influenced by. If you find that you have great self talk, but your immediate environment drags you down.. I think you know what you have to do in order to grow.
2. Create Peak States
Self-awareness is part of the emotional intelligence required to get to your breakthrough. Our state of mind is the key ingrediant to getting the result we want, so we must create a state of complete production. The good news? You can create it instantly. The quickest way to change your state is to get active, get your heart rate going and take some deep breaths of air. This will completely change your physiology and will in turn change the way you feel about what you’re facing. The next step is the important part- associate strong feelings about how you feel. Feelings like love, or confidence are good to use. Go back to a time when you felt like the world was yours and you felt like you could accomplish anything. Feels pretty good right? Replay the scenario in your head making it larger and more vivid each time. Have the ability to make it so overwhelmingly real by focusing how good you felt, you step into the experience and embody those feelings in real time. Developing the ability to do that consistently on an every day basis will allow you to completely eliminate times of despair or any negative feelings because you now not only know it’s possible to feel different, but you can do it on command.
3. Get a New Strategy
You ever punch a brick wall? That’s what it can be compared to trying to fight your way through adversity. There is no point in trying to overcome a predicament when you’re not doing it the right way. Even if we were to achieve the same results, the better solution is to do it in a faster amount of time with less pain in the experience. Own up to what is holding you back, not only because many times it is internal conflict that needs resolution- but also because the better you understand it, the easier it will be to solve. Strategy comes down to work. The moment you are committed to changing, you will become more resourceful. Your resources should be anyone who has gone through and successfully overcome what you are set out to do. Plug in your work ethic to a good gameplan, and you’ll create an entire new structure for how you problem solve.
4. Be Grounded in Your Beliefs
Do you know what you stand for? Your values and standards will determine how your life plays out. You see, these show what we accept and do not accept in our lives. My last action step for this concludes with another log. As you go about your day, write down 1. What happens to you 2. How you feel about it 3. What you do about it
The three conscious choices we have at every moment is what we want to focus on, how we choose to feel about it, and what we’re going to do about it.
Too many times we leave our focus to our subconscious- which by the way fucking sucks for our purpose because the brain isn’t trying to bring you fulfillment or happiness, it’s trying to keep you operating to survive. Our brain is a very old supercomputer that still thinks it needs to be on the lookout for danger at all times. Helpful? Many times yes. The problem though, is that if you’re focused on subconscious surviving-you’re not focused on consciously thriving. If you don’t think about what you’re focused on, you usually don’t care to ask yourself if your first reaction is how you actually feel about it. Once again, your brain picks a feeling based on neuron receptors designed to keep you alive. Use the peak states you created, and activate them whenever you’re consciously focused. This will in turn change what you do,which ultimately is the determinant of your success.
- Create a list of what you 1. Want AND have in your life (ex. Time to meditate) 2. Don’t Want BUT Have (ex. Stress from relationships) 3. Want BUT Don’t Have (ex. The ability to feel at peace) 4. Don’t Want AND Don’t Have. This will help you become very clear with what you’re trying to accomplish, even when you have no idea how to start.
- Monitor the way you talk to yourself on a daily basis. Being self aware is a must because it is necessary to understand what you’re good at and what you suck at. That pure honesty with yourself is going to further grow the important relationships you need as well.
- Write down the names of five people in your life that you are influenced by the most. Listen to what your gut says if you want the quick answer of whether or not they should stay there. If you’re not growing, you’re dying. If these 20% of people in your life make up 80% of who you are as a person, are you ok with their presence determining your outcome?
- Create peak states and learn how it feels to be in them. In order for it to be effective, you must plug in that peak state when you are subconsciously operating in another. Demand a state of pure bliss, gratefulness, maximum energy.. Make it beautiful. Remember, you are whatever your brain focuses on.
- Understand your outcome and reverse engineer it. Know what you see yourself being at the end of the breakthrough, and work backwards from there. Study the strategy of how others achieved the same result. Find a mentor that helps you understand it in the easiest light possible.
- Learn why you wake up everyday. There is nothing scary about soul searching. Ask yourself meaningful questions to deliver meaningful answers. Your why needs to be greater than the force trying to keep you still, or move you backwards.