Homelessness, helplessness, and social media

A reflection from lived experience.

A million years ago (actually about 20) in another time and place, I was homeless. I slept on couches or a shelter. As you can imagine, being out of resources, options and safety nets is traumatic. I remember the invisibility, the “otherness” and the shame of being unable to provide for myself at that time. If “damaged” was a feeling, that would be a great descriptor too. At least this was my experience.

It happens all the time. You’ll see a “heartwarming” story on social media when a well-meaning man or woman will find someone who is poor, struggling or homeless and give them lovely gifts, opportunities, housing, food, money. This is a lovely thing to do, but it turns ugly when the recipients are put on camera to react, to be grateful, to cry, to be the other person in a two-person skit for the benefit of strangers.

If your best friend reached out to borrow money, would you film yourself handing them money and post on social media about your good deed? Make sure you get a close up of their beaming, grateful face?

Filming disadvantaged people swallowing their pride for help in whatever way costs their dignity, please don’t do it. Even if the situation is highlighting “how far they have come”. All of this can be traumatizing. When the “them” in a story is not an “us”, the disconnect is underlined.

For myself, I am doing great, am happy, and most of this is far in the rearview mirror. Except when I see someone in a troubled state thrust into social media as a story prop. At least consider blurring the face, or hiding their features. Love one another.