This is Therapy
Hello my name is Calvin. I don’t usually do these but my gi…….ex girlfriend does this as a form of therapy in order to deal with problems. It worked and we were happy until…..
She had a beef with my best friend who was female and the beef got bigger and bigger. Naturally she came to me to deal with it and I feel like I did to the best of the abilities. We got in arguments about it and about me not being able to hold the information I wanted to be important but my brain said that it wasn't. I would forget stuff that she has told me a million times and I would get angry that she would tell me over and over again. There were times that I wanted to leave on the spot but I didn’t. Why. Cause I couldn’t see myself without her.
A few days ago my best friend called her out and sent a paragraph long text messages. Understandingly she was upset and I was expecting her to text back to my best friend with the same fight I have seen toward me. That didn’t happen until the next day and she didn’t text her, she texted me. She wanted to know how my best friend knew about stuff that she had told me in private. I didn’t have an answer because me and my best friend talk about everything because we didn't expect to be calling out each other’s bf/gf. I got mad that she blaimed me for a problem that I wasn’t even involved with and I said that I was done. She texted me a few times asking what I ment and to not leave. Finally she said that she was going to leave me alone and that she knew what I ment. I thought that ment that we were gonna take a break and talk hours later, except…..
I texted her later in the day I texted her to see how she was doing. She told me that she had thought that I broken up with her earlier. I said that I guess and that if she wanted to stay apart. She said yes because she didn’t trust me at all due to the things that I told my best freind. It started to hit me what I had done and immediately regretted it, im not ashamed of it I did cry.
This leads us to now. Days after our break up and I still can’t see myself without her. Whenever I am alone I can feel her hugs and kisses and start to tear up.
I don’t know who was right and who was wrong since this is just my side of the story.
This is not a plea to take me back and I don’t expect her to take me back due to the stuff that I have done.
I want to remember her and not tear up but smile.
I want her to know that I love her and miss her
I want to know if she feels the same.
As I have told her before it is never a good thing to bottle up things
This is my way of letting things out once and for all.
This is her way of dealing with her problems and is my way of remembering.
This is our therapy.
