Angle on BEING IN LOVE, answer some questions for me.
The picture above is a screen shot of my Merriam Webster dictionary app’s definition of LOVE.
My Oxford (not a recent edition, mind you and not an app) Dictionary gives one definition as, “Having great affection or tenderness towards someone or something”.
Neither of these definitions have answered the questions I have on “being in love”.
I once read a quote in a book which said,”Marriage is like travelling abroad. If no one knew it was there, we would never go”.
I wonder if this isn’t the same with love.
We grow up reading about this great emotion. We hear it everywhere. On the news. In books. In history lessons. In art. In music. On the streets. Everywhere.
It is a constant recurring theme. Our mind assimilates that knowledge and stows it somewhere in our consciousness. And no matter how much we then proclaim that we do not care for love and are not looking for it, I think our environment has already programmed us to… in ways we do not even realise maybe to find it and accept it.
The debate has raged forever over the similarities between these 3 and how easy it is to miscontrue one for the other.
Is it that Lust + Like = Love?
If that is the case, then it seems pretty straightforward.
However, many people would say Love is more than that. I don’t know.
There are too many schools of thought on what “being in love” truly is about that it has me confused.
Who is more in love with a woman who vehemently asks to be left alone: The man who gives her space so she can come to him when she is ready OR the man who sticks around when she orders him to go?
Who is more in love: the partner who allows you to try everything not stopping you so you can express yourself OR the partner that curbs your excesses because they are moved to protect you from harm?
Who is truly in love with you: the one that allows you be who you are comfortable being OR the one who tries to change you because they feel you can do better?
Which is a better love match: people with the same tastes OR opposites?
Most people would have differing view points on some of these.
Here’s where it gets truly interesting… the person you’re in love with, will in all likelihood have a different interpretation of love from you. So when you say the words, “I love you” to each other, fundamentally you both mean something different.
How does that bode for the long run?
How is it that people fall out of love? This is a hazy concept for me.
How is it that people cheat on people they claim to still love? Another hazy concept.
So here are my questions:
Where does Respect factor in love?
How big a player is trust?
Where does hate come in? (They say there is a thin line between love and hate)
How large is the role that lust has to play?
Is exclusivity a natural progression resulting from a state of being in love or just our way of preventing diseases?
The ultimate test of being in love is popularly agreed to be a willingness to give up one’s own life for another. However, in an evolving society where people are demonstrating increased self-centredness and where violence continues to bombard the world and the value placed on human lives slowly decreases over time as people become numb as a way to self-protect, can we still place the same value on this belief as we did…. say 2000 years ago?
Finally, have we ever stopped to ask… Am I in love with this person or am I in love with the idea of being in love with this person?
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I would love to hear the feedbacks on this in the comments section. I hope to gain from different views for greater perspective ☺
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