I’m at peace with both men and women holding on to hilariously superficial requirements when it…
Adam Lasnik

Loved Heidi’s original article and the response below. And appreciate Adam’s comment as well.

How about thinking of love/marriage as a moral project? David Brooks argues in the NYT:

The everyday tasks of marriage are opportunities to cultivate a more selfless love. Everyday there’s a chance to inspire and encourage your partner to become his or her best self. In this lens, marriage isn’t about two individuals trying to satisfy their own needs; it’s a partnership of mutual self-giving for the purpose of moral growth and to make their corner of the world a little better.

Replace the word marriage with love, and perhaps we can reframe our approach towards relationships.