The Great Wall Spoilers
Despite knowing about the effects of magnetism on the Tao Tie for NINE CENTURIES…
…Matt Damon is the only one in the ENTIRE COUNTRY that has a lodestone.
Despite having an entire order, thousands-strong, of the country’s most disciplined martial artists…
…Matt Damon is the only one that can MOVE ASIDE when one of the monsters charges.
Despite having COUNTLESS PLATOONS OF THE COUNTRY’S FINEST ARCHERS…
…Matt Fucking Damon is the only one that can shoot with anything like accuracy.
To say that I’m disappointed in this movie is to make an understatement.
You can say he shows respect to the country’s military and culture.
You can claim that it makes the Chinese characters reasonable and honorable.
You can make any outlandish defense of this movie as you want.
And all the apologies you can muster won’t sop up the mess that is The Great Wall.