I Dream of a Man

People often criticize me for the negative comments I make when tackling the subject of marriage. It is fair to say that it is not marriage in particular I am against, but rather the conception that most people have of it.

Unlike other girls or women, I do not dream of wearing the white dress. My dream goes way beyond the trivialities of the dream night, the wedding night.
My dream, as far-fetched and irrational as it may sound to many, involves finding a man I willingly vow to stay faithful to - a vow i make not to God, not to a priest, not to a sheikh, not to a minister, even not to my husband himself, but to myself before anyone else.

A man that will make my heart skip a beat years from now, who shares my passions and hobbies. A man who knows me, with my unpredictable mood swings, my severe PMS, my perfectionist tendencies, my control freak behavior, my feminism, my fragile heart and my sharp mind. A man capable of scratching my brain with a deep midnight conversation about how the world came to exist or what have you.

A man who would not be jealous of my success and would not have his masculinity threatened by the number of degrees I hold or how much money I make.

A man who would not complain about me "dumping the kids on him" when i’m on a business trip making a living, a man who would, on the other hand, appreciate my effort and encourage me to strive for more.

A man who would be content with my company and not become miserable if no children come along the way.

I dream of a man who would take my breath away and not my freedom, who knows what compromise actually means.

I dream of a man who appreciates effort and whose jaw drops whenever he sees me all dolled up for him. A man who looks at me everyday like he caught his very own star, even when i’m old and wrinkled.

A man who knows that, given the freedom, I would always choose him above anything else. That I would run errands for him. That I would strive to build an empire with. That I would cook his meals and look after him and our home with unconditional care and devotion.

I dream of an actual Man, a partner and not some empty shell with strong arms, killer abs and a beard. And I am not in a hurry. The sanest thing to do would be to discover yourself and what you actually want before embarking on a journey that might crash midway.

“The goal is not to get married, the goal is to stay married.”

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