Before 3 am

I lie to myself every night before 3 am.I always think how tomorrow I will wake up in the early morning, brush my teeth ,wash my face, make that strong coffee of mine that I always make in a really careful way ,taking care I don`t wake anyone up, smoke that morning cigarette that always makes me feel dizzy ,and then leave to the library full motivated to study for my exams.

I would lie if I say I do this everyday.But I try.I don`t lie when I say, I make that coffee of mine, taking care If I wake anyone up.I really do care more than I really should.

I lie to myself every night before 3 am when I think my life sucks , and I need changes. I really do.But I never take the first steps of making changes into my life.That`s because I trust none, and trusting none makes you only over trust yourself , and when you trust yourself so much, you are the only one who lies to yourself every night before 3 am.