Some Perspective on Today’s Turn of Events

Mai Dones
Mai Dones
Aug 8, 2017 · 3 min read

Due to some person’s poor planning, I had to salvage someone else’s problem and it cost me two days’ worth of backlogs and 16 hours of sanity.

I am allergic to stupidity. I am saying this not because I am infallible, but because I know I can be hard on myself. I appraise the amount of joy or frustration I attach to an event or activity the same way I evaluate how much respect is due to a person. There is only one criteria: how much thought was put into this?

You see, people who have self-respect are people who neither abuse nor are abused. I think this is something the person does not understand. The fact that it’s her job, and she’s been in the company for five years, she does not have any right to repeat the same mistakes. It’s just a tiny bit of thinking.

Apart from that, she does not have any right to drag me into her mess. If you mess up, have the decency to clean it up — yourself. Don’t expect other people to clean up after you. I’ve been cleaning up after too many people and I’m tired. I hate to be associated with mediocre things. I will loose sleep over anything that’s less than I know I am capable of doing.

That’s inefficiency. Totally. If you knew how to do one thing right and best, and chose not to act accordingly, that’s inefficiency.

Knowing makes all the difference. Innocence deserves suspension of judgment. Ignorance does not.

But, this is just me letting off steam.

In my reflection returning to the office from the airport (I walked 3 kilometers going back to the office as walking helps me clear my mind), I realize that the Blessed Mother does not follow the same guidelines I use (What great consolation!). I am yet to come up with a proper response that pleases her and that does not compromise my self-respect, but I recognize that I am deeply frustrated right at this moment.

Second, I am really tired. I am tired because my grandaunt is in pain, I am helping out friends with mounting a conference, I am running programs here and there, my boss expects me to solve work woes while he’s away, I cannot afford poor performance, and school is starting this week. There’s a lot on my plate. And, then, this comes:

Friends, our Gospel today is the story of Jesus walking on the water. Water is, throughout the Scriptures, a symbol of danger. At the very beginning, the spirit of the Lord hovered over the surface of the waters. This signals God’s lordship over all of the powers of disorder.

In all four Gospels there is a version of this story of Jesus mastering the waves. The boat, with Peter and the other disciples, is evocative of the Church. It moves through the waters, and the Church will move through time. Storms — chaos, corruption, stupidity, danger, persecution — will inevitably arise.

Now during the fourth watch of the night, which is to say the darkest time of the night, Jesus comes walking on the sea. This is meant to be an affirmation of his divinity: just as the spirit of God hovered over the waters at the beginning, so Jesus hovers over them now. So he says to his terrified disciples: “Take courage, it is I; do not be afraid.” But even more than that: you can participate in my power. “Peter got out of the boat and began to walk on the water toward Jesus.” This is the story of all the saints.

This is from Bp. Robert Barron.

I am done ranting. I know something can be done. Christ can help me master the waves, and not use the waves as an excuse for not knowing how to rise above the mess. I just had to acknowledge that I am pissed, but I know something better can come out of this.

Blessed be God. (Whew)

Mai Dones

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Mai Dones

Learning Designer. Design Thinking Junkie. Expand-the-pie kind of girl.