Standard Etiquette For A Beer-pointment
Beer-pointment
beerˈpointmənt/
noun
an arrangement to meet someone at a particular time and place to have a couple of beers
There are many rites of passage in life but by far one of the most important is grabbing your first beer. Grabbing that bottle of Star/big stout/ small stout (nobody starts out drinking Heineken so let’s not even pretend)taking your first sip and screaming internally
HOW THE HELL DO PEOPLE ENJOY DRINKING THIS SHIT!
If you’re with your guys, you don’t want to fall hand, so you just put up a bold face while you’re hurting inside
Fast forward to a couple of years later and by now you cannot understand how people live without beer! By this time, you’ve progressed from drinking that abomination called Star Lager.
Heineken has arrested you on your way to Damascus like Brother Paul and you even have a squad of drinking buddies. In time, you get invited to your first beer-pointment.
For most Nigerians, this means unlimited awoof, an opportunity to drink themselves under the table because they don’t expect to contribute to the bill.
et·i·quette
ˈedəkət,ˈedəˌket/
noun
noun: etiquette; plural noun: etiquettes
the customary code of polite behavior in society or among members of a particular profession or group.
Believe it or not, there are etiquettes which govern beer-pointment and to ensure you get invited to more than just one, follow these easy tips.
No Drink Pass The Person Way Invite You
So, you’re out with your guy(s) and clearly he’s picking up the tab, this is still not an invitation to be shameless and throw your common sense away. As a rule of the thumb, don’t drink more than the person who has invited you out.
The only clause to this is if the convener has clearly given you cart-blanche to kill yourself by yourself.
Contribute Something, Anything To The Table!
Knowing its an invitation to come through and drink free booze should really not stop you from chipping in a little. Buy suya, cigarettes or pretty much anything for your guy(s) at the table!
Basically, don’t be a cheapskate
Don’t Bring a Plus One Without Asking
Nobody cares if your plus one is the most beautiful woman on the planet, it is usually a really bad idea to bring someone along without asking first. Seeing as no be you wan spend money, borrow yourself small brain and ask for permission first.
Convene A Beer-pointment
Don’t become one of those people who drinks everybody’s beer but will never buy for others!
This rule applies to both genders. If you’re going to make a habit of following boys out and drinking their free beer, do the honorable thing and pick up the tab before they all start avoiding you.
Don’t Drink Malt Please
By far the worst sort of people are those who clearly know they’re going for a beer-pointment and drink Malta Guinness.
Talmabout, ‘I don’t feel like drinking today’;
Well hombre, you should have sat your ass at home!
That’s all folks! Let me know if I missed anything