Jul 25, 2017 · 1 min read
. Faltering between a state of calmness and just panicked anxiety .
It’s this extreme chill type of calm. Laughing, joking, enjoying life generally. Enjoying it wayyy too much. I damn well know I have a lot I should be worried about and working a lot harder on. But instead I’ve let myself just pause everything and let life steer me wherever. And I’m enjoying the stillness of it, so much less effort needed.
Then reality hits me every once in a while, and there comes the panic and the anxiety. That I’m not doing enough, that I’m not spending my time the right way, that I’m behind in life, that I can be doing so much more, etc. In short, nothing good.
Honestly life is just really complicated and I want to be over it.
