HEART OF STEEL:
Just toughen up.
I get it, some of you can just bounce back. You here things, you go through things, and you grow through them. You can ignore, you can not take things to heart, you’re not deeply affected by much.
Good for you.
It’s not that easy for all of us. I’m sensitive, and I’m finally starting to get what that means for me. I need to take a step back sometimes. I take things to personally, I feel things too much, I don’t know how to be involved without getting emotionally attached. All this sadness and numbness I feel isn’t always mine, so I need to back up. I don’t mean to be rude or mean, I just can’t get too close without hurting myself too. And I want to help, I really want to do nothing but help. At times that means me taking a step back so I can come back clearly and help through logic. Once I get emotionally tied I know I’m not much help at all.
Don’t mistake my sensitivity for weakness though. I’m starting to realize that a sensitive heart doesn’t mean a weak one. A soft heart is a strong heart. A tough heart is a heart unwilling and unable to open and connect with others, and if that’s what you want that’s ok. Just don’t mistake my vulnerability for lack of control and lack of mental and emotional strength. If anything I’m stronger in that sense.
I like to think of my heart as elastic, strength in the ability to mold and eventually bounce back. The ability to be affected, the ability to emphasize and sympathize, and the deep passion to help others. Yet still able to be tough, even though I’m not fully in control of that yet. I’d much rather my elastic heart than a impenetrable heart of steel, but thats just me. The pain is all worth it in the end, even when I can’t always see that.