How to Get a Mail Order Bride: Can You Really Buy a Bride?

Owen Bartell
14 min readJan 16, 2024

Having interacted with mail order brides worldwide and gained vast experience in this sphere, I would like to outline my experience in a new post without those cliches and old-school myths. If you are a romantically inclined single who strives to build international relationships, knowing how to get a mail order bride will be an additional point to winning the cross-cultural romance scene. I am here with you to guide you to the world of international dating and mail order bride services.

How to get a mail order bride

Best Mail Order Bride Sites 2024: The Ultimate Top 5

Without a doubt, mail order brides sites are the most effective, affordable, and easy way to find a bride abroad. Having personally tried and tested dozens of popular international dating sites, we can finally present our top five:

  • SofiaDate — Best for discovering and interacting with amazing European ladies
  • SakuraDate — Best for online dating with stunning and delicate Asian beauties
  • La Date — Best for establishing romantic connections with Latina women
  • UkrainianCharm — Best for chatting and flirting with real Slavic girls
  • BravoDate — Best for building serious relationships with European women

Who Are Mail Order Brides and Are Mail Order Brides Real?

With so much online discourse surrounding mail order wives, one cannot help but wonder: are mail order brides a real thing? I can assure you that mail order brides are absolutely real, as long as you use proven ways to meet them — for example, by using reputable international dating services.

Modern real mail order brides are regular foreign women who made a life-changing decision to look for a foreign husband and then move abroad to live with their new husband and start a family. These women can be anywhere between 18 and 55. They can be single or divorced. They may have kids or be childless but willing to have kids with their soulmate. What these women have in common is a sincere desire to turn their lives around by marrying a foreign guy.

Mail Order Bride Concept from an Ethical Point of View

Having browsed numerous forums and social media websites, I noticed that the waters surrounding the concept of mail order wives are a tad murky. This is mainly because of the myths related to this notion. I would like to debunk some of the most popular stereotypes to highlight the common misconceptions related to brides websites and the mail brides industry in general.

A lot of Western men consider international dating sites to be involved in human trafficking. I even stumbled upon such a post on Quora. Suffice it to say that a lot of men still believe that it is illegal. The main ground for such a misconception is the term “buy mail order bride.” Nevertheless, I would like to explain to all newbies that it has nothing in common with exploitative labor and migration. It just means that all men who register on mail order bride websites should pay for their services to have the opportunity to meet a future wife online.

Another post on Reddit inspired me to counter false beliefs about the sexual objectification of young women from abroad. I dug deeper and found interesting and informative research that helped me shed light on the problem of objectifying beliefs about mail order brides. Indeed, 12% of male representatives believe that mail order brides websites give quick access to women who are ready to accomplish all the sexual goals of clients of such platforms. Nevertheless, the truth is positive. Ladies who sign up for dedicated platforms usually seek genuine romantic connections, long-distance relationships, social connections, and even marriage.

My research encouraged me to draw a few conclusions related to the ethical considerations related to foreign women seeking men abroad.

  • Dating services aren’t about human trafficking. They just charge money for communication tools or a premium membership.
  • Finding women abroad is absolutely legal, and it doesn’t imply any hidden context.
  • Ladies registered on the best mail order brides services aren’t objects of sexual objectification. Most often, they are looking for a serious relationship and meaningful bonds.

Why Do Men Want Foreign Wives?

Now that you know the answer to the question Are mail order spouses real?”, let’s move on to another important question — why the idea to mail order a bride is so popular among Western men? I interviewed multiple men to better understand their intentions to find a wife overseas. I must say that all motivations are pretty different. I differentiate the top 3 reasons why a mail order wife can be your perfect life companion:

  • Foreign brides have diverse features. Since you can technically buy a bride from any foreign country, it means that you can find a woman with any features you fancy, whether it’s a particular skin tone, body type, hair color, or personality traits.
  • Mail order brides are deeply loyal. One of the things that unites all mail order brides is that they are ready to fully commit to their partners. These women appreciate their men and will never do anything to break the trust in their relationship.
  • A mail order wife is perfect for family life. Most foreign ladies don’t share the feminist ideas of Western women. Foreign brides want to become wives and mothers and take care of their loved ones in every way possible.
  • Men can find soulmates of diverse nationalities on dedicated sites. It is rather difficult to find a soulmate of another nationality within your proximity. On dedicated platforms, it is possible to meet women from Eastern European countries, Asian mail order brides, or ladies from Latin America. The choice of beautiful women is just limitless.
  • A variety of potential partners. Once you sign up for a mail order bride website, you can communicate with multiple attractive women simultaneously until you find your perfect match. It is an easy and hassle-free way to meet a soul mate without putting in much effort.
Are mail order brides real

Why Do Women Become Mail Order Brides?

What are the real motivations of foreign brides to meet soulmates abroad? I had a word with several ladies registered on dating websites, so now I am ready to share their thoughts with you.

  • Most mail order brides want to meet men of different cultures to share their values and relationship aspirations.
  • Some Asian girls and European brides want to improve their well-being with the help of international marriage.
  • More mail order brides dream of a perfect Western guy who will infuse their relationships with care, understanding, and love.
  • Ladies from Latin America are sick and tired of local machos who disregard their values. They are looking for peace in love affairs.
  • A lot of girls from Eastern Europe, particularly Ukrainian women, experience a lack of potential partners on the local dating scene. That is why they switch to international dating to find a decent man.

Are Mail Order Brides Legal?

The question of legality is an important one to discuss when it comes to online brides: you definitely don’t want to be a step away from your dream marriage only to realize it may not be legal. I can attest to the fact that the majority of love hunters who have joined reputable online dating services have achieved their romantic goals. Moreover, while relying on the statistics, I would like to mention that 14% of online daters get married to someone they met on a dating site or app.

Luckily, there is nothing to worry about from the legal point of view with foreign brides: in the eyes of the law, your mail order bride is just a foreign citizen who wants to marry an American guy. All she needs is a special fiancé visa, and then she will have the opportunity to legally become your wife.

Those who question the legality of mail order brides can apply to the laws and governmental acts. Thus, the two main documents protect the rights of foreign women who want to get married to American men. The Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) allows a foreign spouse who is a victim of domestic violence to apply for a green card independently of their abuser. The International Marriage Broker Regulation Act, or IMBRA regulates dating services between US and foreign citizens, which allows for more transparent immigration and smooth relationship development.

Can You Really Buy a Wife?

I want to be perfectly clear here: when we talk about how to buy a wife or wifes for sale, what we mean is a chance to look for a foreign bride online and invest money into making this experience successful for you. So no, you cannot literally buy wife online because that would be both illegal and immoral. The good news is that there is nothing illegal about buying brides gifts and otherwise spending money on wooing the woman you like.

How to Get a Mail Order Bride

Once you decide you need a mail order bride in your life, the next question is where to find one. Right now, you can choose from two options: to do your search offline or online.

Offline

Looking for a bride offline usually means temporarily moving to a foreign country and trying to meet as many women there as possible, hoping that one of the connections will develop into something serious. This doesn’t always work out because you may simply not have enough time to build a lasting relationship as a tourist in a foreign country. Moreover, not every woman you meet may want to move abroad to marry you.

Online

Looking for a bride online means signing up for one of the popular dating websites and meeting foreign brides from the comfort of your own home. You can develop the relationship at your own comfortable pace and only meet in real life when you want. The main benefit of this method is that you get to meet women who want to marry foreign men and move abroad, so the probability of a successful match is much higher compared to offline dating.

Top 5 Best Countries to Find a Wife

One of the best things about looking for a bride online is that you don’t have to confine yourself to just one location. With the help of a good dating site, you can instantly connect with women from any corner of the world and enjoy smooth communication since foreign brides typically know English well. Still, there are several countries that are particularly popular among those who want to find a wife abroad. These are the top 5 countries:

5 best countries to find a wife
  • Ukraine. Ukrainian brides are a complete package: they are famously good-looking, kind, fun, have a great sense of humor, and have an excellent rapport with anyone they meet.
  • The Philippines. Filipino brides are popular for a reason: they are beautiful and petite, modest and serious, but also deeply feminine and sexy, although they can take time to open up.
  • Colombia. With a Colombian bride, you will never have to guess how she feels: these women are excellent communicators. They are also protective of their loved ones.
  • Russia. Russian brides are educated, ambitious, and take good care of the people they love. A Russian bride will always push you to new accomplishments and victories.
  • China. Chinese brides are perfect for men who enjoy a duality in women: a confident, resourceful personality behind a soft and feminine exterior.

Facts and Statistics About Mail Order Marriages

Even with the best foreign brides, you never know how your own experience is going to go until you get to live through it. However, learning some facts and numbers about mail order brides and marriages to them can give you an idea of what to expect. Here are some key tidbits to learn:

  • Even though many people are not even aware of the mail order bride phenomenon yet, the history of mail order spouses dates back as far as the 17th century.
  • Marriage to foreigners is extremely popular in the US: every year, thousands of foreign nationals obtain K-1 visas and arrive in the US to marry American citizens.
  • According to the statistics, the top 5 countries by the number of K-1 visa recipients include the Philippines, Vietnam, Ukraine, Colombia, and Mexico.
  • For a country that produces the largest number of mail order brides, the Philippines also has an anti-mail order bride law, which means that if you want to marry a Filipina, you’ll have to do it in the US or in a third country.
  • How many mail-order marriages end in divorce? There is no way to tell for sure because most of those marriages are not registered as mail order unions. However, a good 80% of those marriages pass the one-year mark.
  • In the United States, international marriages have a divorce rate of about 20%, while the failure rate of traditional marriages in the US is more than 32%.
  • The relevant statistics note that international marriages have almost 10% higher success rate compared to unions with locals in the US.

The Cost of Buying a Wife Online

Finally, let’s talk about the mail order bride cost, which I find an essential topic to discuss. From my experience of interacting with Western men, it is the main question they ponder before registering on an online dating site. Here are the approximate expenses you’ll face:

  • Online dating. Here, you’ll need to pay for membership and or/credits on your dating site of choice. This type of expense also includes virtual and real gifts you can send to women. On average, dating online costs $50-$300 per month.
  • Offline dating. When it’s time to meet your bride in real life, you’ll need to take care of things like plane tickets, accommodation, food, entertainment, and transportation. Depending on the destination, a two-week trip can cost you $3,000-$5,000.
  • K-1 visa. The K-1 visa is a mandatory requirement for a foreign national who wants to marry an American citizen. The overall expenses of getting a K-1 visa can amount to $2,500.

What Are the Main Difficulties of Mail Order Bride Marriages?

From my experience, I can say that not everything is as smooth in cross-cultural relationships as it may seem. Getting a foreign wife means overcoming certain kinds of obstacles to achieve harmony in relationships.

  • Time-consuming immigration process. It takes time to bring your future spouse to the US. For example, to get a fiancé visa, you will need to be in a relationship for at least two years.
  • Language barrier. Not all foreign ladies speak English fluently. That is why you will need to give time to your lady to improve your English-speaking skills.
  • Cultural differences. Whether looking for Eastern European women or ladies from Latin America or Asia, you will face cultural misconceptions. Both of you should put in hard work to overcome them.
  • Societal judgments. Depending on the circle of your acquaintances, you may face differential public opinions concerning your marriage. You must do your best for societal judgments not to affect your union negatively.

What Do Real People Say About Mail Order Bride Marriages?

After analyzing plenty of real love stories of cross-cultural couples and interviewing real people who met on mail order bride sites and got married, I would like to share real experiences. They will help you understand the main particularities and pitfalls of international love affairs, so take a peek at the main points:

  • Men note that the best mail order brides come from such countries as the Philippines, Thailand, South Korea, Ukraine, Russia, Poland, Mexico, Brazil, and Colombia. Nevertheless, there are a lot of other countries to search for a foreign woman.
  • Mail order brides appear to be more obedient, caring, and supportive compared to local women.
  • Foreign ladies are more family-oriented and loyal. They will hardly put their gazes on other men.
  • The majority of foreign wives don’t rely on their husbands financially. They are goal-centered and are ready to contribute to their family budget.
  • Cross-cultural relationships are amazing since they allow for exploring absolutely new values and opening new horizons in life.
What Do Real People Say About Mail Order Bride Marriages?

How to Avoid Mail Order Bride Scams?

The online dating industry is unpredictable, so before registering on a mail order bride site, you will need to get equipped with useful tips to avoid scams online. I created a brief guide that will help you find a foreign wife without any trouble.

  • Trustworthy dating websites or mail order bride services are good options. These platforms offer verified profiles of attractive women and anti-scam policies to foster a safe communication environment.
  • Examine user comments regarding a specific platform. Because of this, you can use real user experiences as inspiration to decide whether a specific dating site is reliable or not.
  • Double-check your partner’s identity. You must decide whether you are communicating with a real person if you wish to build a relationship with someone you met online. To confirm the legitimacy of your partner’s photos, use Google Lens.
  • Slow down. You must back off if you see something fishy or believe it to be a scam. Take your time building your relationship, avoid rash decisions, and discuss your circumstances with friends and family. You might get the best answer from those closest to you.
  • If you suspect a scam, head over to the FTC site and report your case. This is an official government platform that assists with investigations by sharing reports with trustworthy law enforcement partners.
  • In case you accidentally reveal your personal information to a suspicious person online, go to IdentityTheft.gov and undergo a recovery plan. It is an effective spot for victims of identity theft run by the federal government.

Final Thoughts: Are Online Wives Worth It?

If you are one of those adventurous love-seekers who wants to find mail order brides, you will need to delve deeper into this sphere. I understand that the concept of a foreign bride may seem somewhat confusing to many potential daters. However, as someone involved in the niche, I can safely say that there is nothing to worry about once you sign up for a reputable mail order bride service. I have already analyzed numerous successful love stories among those who met on dating sites. Such relationships are truly amazing since online communication allows couples to better get to know each other and assess their intentions before taking their bonds to the next level.

Related articles:

  1. Countries that Love American Men: Exploring International Romance
  2. Do Mail Order Brides Still Exist?
  3. How Much Is a Mail Order Bride: Factors, Expenses, and Tips
  4. How to Get a Husband: Woman’s Guide To Looking For Husband
  5. Best Countries to Find a Wife: A Global Love Quest
  6. Best European Cities For Single American Guys
  7. Online Dating Tips That Every Beginner Should Know
  8. Dating Profile Mistakes: How to Write a Good Dating Profile

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  3. Cloudwards. Citing References. [online] Available from: https://www.cloudwards.net/online-dating-statistics/#:~:text=What%20Percentage%20of%20Online%20Daters,a%20dating%20site%20or%20app. [Accessed 14 March 2024].
  4. Forbes Advisor. Citing References. [online] Available from: https://www.forbes.com/advisor/legal/divorce/divorce-statistics/#divorce_rates_by_country_section [Accessed 14 March 2024].
  5. Reddit. Citing References. [online] Available from: https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/kpklxe/why_mail_order_brides_is_stigmatised_for_incels/. [Accessed 14 March 2024].
  • By clicking on the affiliate links in this content, you’re supporting my work as I may earn a commission from your purchases, without any additional cost to you.

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Owen Bartell

I am an online dating writer at BestBrirdes. I have my own writing style, I am constantly learning and getting new qualifications from the best online experts.