What Happens When You Are No Longer With Your “Daddy”/Husband?

I’ve wanted to do this post for a while now, but fear has stood in my way. I guess fear of being too vulnerable. To honest. To open and I think deep down feeling too needy. But not anymore. I wanted to have an honest conversation with all of you, my faithful readers about my first-hand experience the last two years after losing my husband of 18 years on July 29th, 2021. Daddy Jim and I were together for eighteen years. The last two of it in hospice in our home. It wasn’t easy, but now those last two years are the ones that mean the most to me.

Before that, eight years before (for a total of 10 years) we didn’t have sex as his prostate had been shaved as it had grown enlarged and needed to be treated. It also made his erections impossible and once that happened he lost interest physically as well as sexually. It also meant he lost interest romantically too, again not ideal but we made it work. Not ideal, but it was what it was. We also grew to the point where we shared different bedrooms:

1. I was sleeping better alone.

2. It gave me time to use my dildos. Again maybe being too honest here but it’s the truth. Without his sexual interest & being in a monogamous relationship I had to have some kind of outlet.