I find myself always in a mental hibernation;

a blockage of concentration.

where is focused thought?

I find that ever so often I’m sitting there watching his mouth, watching it curl into a cosmic hybrid of a smile or frown all at the same time watching it open and close open and close

this lighting makes me sleepy.. or he makes me sleepy.. and now i’m drifting and I can’t help closing my eyes I keep what seems like aggressively reopening them to try to be fully here where i’m supposed to be

but no matter what my eyes keep closing and reopening and i am not here anymore i am there , that way, and nowhere.

his words, their still here, somewhere, yes, I can somewhat comprehend them trying to write notes and pretend i’m with you at the same time, trying to remember what i’m writing and imagine if god is real at the same time, trying to remember why i’m writing and imagine if I am even real, at the same time.

I heard day dreaming is good for you today.

If it is, I’m the healthiest person I've ever met.