Re-Designing Your Mind:

What if I Fall? Oh, but my darling what if you fly?” — Erin Hanson

So this is about one of my favorite topics. Fear. Fear is undoubtedly the biggest block of potential. Can you imagine being fearless? The freedom you could have, you could effectively achieve anything if you choose too! BUT the sad truth is that fear is a feeling WE create from within.

So how do you get rid of fear? Well firstly I recently came to learn to appreciate fear, WAIT…think about, really think about it, fear as negative as it can be, can also play as a indicator that lets us know that what we are/could be/about to do something that could potentially better our situation hence why fear creeps up on us, I reckon it’s what causes all the weird stomach movements (butterflies), or the tightening of the chest, or all those feelings, just before certain actions.

Fear is like the default setting, it will cause us to act in a way to protect ourselves at all costs, but at the expense of possibly missing an opportunity.

For example, ever seen a girl or boy walk by, and everything in you wants to walk to him/her and speak, but the moment you move your foot, your belly drops, your chest gets funny etc?? (maybe not all people, but a good majority)

What normally follows is a set of questions we ask ourselves that discourage us from moving forward with the action. In the instance of the example with the opposite gender we may ask ourselves (I know I’ve asked myself) the following:

· What if s/he rejects me?

· What if s/he has a partner already?

· Am I good looking enough to talk to them?

Then from these questions, your start reassuring yourself to make yourself feel better about letting fear win, they would come normally in reassuring statements you tell yourself like;

· If I see her again, I’ll ask for her number.

· You know what, I bet she is certain way.

· Today is not my day. (I dont really look good today)

These answers make you feel better about not stepping to a challenge, and helps put fear back to sleep, only for the next instance it needs to wake up. The more you put fear to sleep as opposed to actually challenging it and facing it, the stronger fear gets. That’s what some of us have done, given fear so much power it’s now a automatic reaction to doing anything that could potentially cause us embarrassment or discomfort (risk) but equally could potentially move us closer to the path of happiness, success, and/or freedom (which ever you are perusing).

The ONLY way to really beat, or more so control fear when it arises in such instances, is to consciously talk to yourself when fear starts asking you these questions. Rather then putting yourself off, talk yourself up to it. Rather imaging all things that could go wrong, imagine everything that could go right.

So provided another situation with the opposite gender arises, rather then “If I see her again, I’ll ask for her number”

You think “I could just ask for it now, who knows when I will see her again?”

— that slight change in what you tell yourself, that positive affirmation makes a great change in proceeding with the action. A step forward in being able to control your fear, even use it to motivate you to push. (That’s a whole other post)

Law 28: Enter Action with Boldness (The 48 laws of Power, Robert Greene) — which basically tells us; in any and every situation you are faced with, face it with confidence in yourself and your ability.

The key to a happy life is the mind. Being able to have conscious control over your actions, habits, ultimately gives you control over your future.

But… What if I Fall?

Oh, but my darling what if you fly?”

– Erin Hanson

Re- design your mind to re-design your Future

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@QueTheWolf