Minding Our Words

Rajaram Chandra
Nov 3 · 3 min read
A calm mind can become turbulent by verbose thoughts

Whether we like it or not, we are ruled by words. Words play an enormous role in our emotional balance, in the way we think and act. Without words the world can not thrive. Right from morning till you fall asleep in the night, words follow you like leeches. We can not think without words, even for a fraction of a second. Have you ever tried thinking, without a single word popping up? How many of us can think picturesquely without words?

When we were very young, as babies, without a vocabulary, how was our thinking process? Our mind was full of images — creativity at its best. Children play with their toys, all by themselves, unmindful of what’s happening around. Such a state, makes them live only in the present moment. No worries about where their next meal is going to come from. When you live the present moment, you have no opinions, no worries!

Somewhere along the line. as we grew up, we lost our innocence, and words took over our thinking process. Then followed series of interpretations, opinionizings — leading to ceaseless chatter of words inside our heads.

What prompted me to start this post was the abhorrence expressed by some of my friends for words like hope, faith and trust. Words per se have nothing in them. It’s the way we interpret them makes all the difference, from person to person.

“I hope you get well soon,” may be uttered by rote, without actually meaning anything sincere. Under this circumstance, the word ‘hope’ is just a filler for conversation. It’s neutral for the speaker. On the other hand, it may cheer up the listener (positive connotation), or the listener might see through it as a dumb formality (neutral or negative).

We tend to make so many statements involuntarily -
“Have faith. You will see better days.”
“Trust me. This will work out well.”

Ultimately, these words become positive or negative, depending on the strength of the relationship that exists between the speaker and the listener. Stronger the bond, more positive the meanings attached to them. And, strength of the relationship depends solely on the trustworthiness developed between the people concerned.

Why is the bond very important? Because, there is a lot beyond the words — the gestures, the way it’s spoken — carry more meanings than the words. How we interpret the whole communication, depends largely on our understanding of the speaker. The closer we are to them, the more positive the message sounds.

But, while reading a book, or even a blog like this, we assign meanings to the statements depending on our own mental make up!

So, words are just words. By themselves they have no negativity or positivity. It’s just the way that we interpret them that gives them life. So, go beyond the words. Look at the person who utters them. Use your intuition. Do they sound sincere? Then they are ok.

Above all, get out of the temptation to form opinions. They create a mine-field for your sobriety. They tend to colour your thinking, leading to unnecessary emotions.

Be your natural self. Use your sixth sense to assess a statement. Take decision tactfully about how you should react. Then get on with your life.
I would like to end this with a beautiful poem that I read long back. I don’t remember who the author was. It’s called “Truth”

To hear the words
of one who never speaks.
To feel the glance
of one who never looks.
To experience the touch
of one who never reaches out.
To learn that there is honesty
in one who wastes nothing.

Written by

Author, Speaker and Happiness Mentor! Always charmed by the wondrous dimensions of the Human mind.

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