Compartmentalization

Still looking for that all-in-one friend

Is it just me or do you guys also have this tendency of compartmentalizing when it comes to friends? Especially what you share with friends.

Because I have that tendency, like I’ll have specific things that I share with specific friends. That’s why I’ve used the word compartmentalization because it kind of feel that way.

Parang ganito: si friend 1 for acad sharing, then ito namang friend 2 for my non-existent lovelife, at si friend 3 for kalokohan, friend 4 for gossip, friend 5 for my kaweirduhan and so on. Lately ko lang din napansin na may ganong tendency pala ako, hindi ako aware before.

Well some friends may have access to 4 or 5 categories at the same time but I’ve figured I still haven’t found the friend whom I could talk to about everything. Like everything na pati innermost thoughts ko.

Maybe it’s because of my personality? Kasi I’m a paranoid. Super paranoid. I don’t trust people easily. It takes me a long time to warm up with people. (You want examples? 1. Sa college, it took me one whole week to finally talk with my seatmate. 2. Nong magshift ako sa Chem, it took me one whole year to warm up with my classmates. Second year na kami nong simulan ko silang i-add/i-accept/kausapin sa FB, at FB pa ang initial refuge ko, haha.)So unless na magsama talaga tayo ng matagal the probability na maging close tayo ay medyo nonexistent. Kahit na nga magsama tayo ng matagal tapos hindi rin talaga tayo nagclick agad, then there’s no possibility na maging close friend kita.

And thinking about this now, naisip ko na ang magiging super close friends ko lang pala talaga ay yong pinakamatagal ko ng kakilala. Like my best friend from home, so far she’s the one person other than family whom I can honestly say I trust. It’s because I know her very well (I’d like to think that I know her), we’ve grown from the same neighborhood and we’ve pretty much been each other’s friend since elementary. What I’m trying to say here is that I trust a person based on how well I know them. And I can’t figure out if that’s good or bad.