Well, at least those stories get read. Mine don’t. I think I’ll market myself as a wealthy internet entrepreneur and publish self-help articles. Here’s one for starters:

Five Ways to Get Rich Online:

1. Pretend you’re rich
2. Pretend you have the secret everyone else is overlooking
3. Pretend you’re all-wise-all-knowing
4. Throw in a little sympathy to show you’re a nice person
5. Offer a 30 day discount on your awesome product