Life & Best Friends

My phone rang, and it was my wonderful friend calling me, I knew she was traveling tonight and was surely happy to hear from her… what she told me was not at all happy though… she was… I dunno, she was just not herself…

She found herself thinking of life, this one, the other one, she found herself thinking that she has not prepared herself for her other life, the one with eternity… she called me, spoke to me of what she wants to happen in her afterlife… I was shocked, asking her: what’s up? She answered with a smiling voice and all she said was:

وَمَا تَدْرِي نَفْسٌ مَّاذَا تَكْسِبُ غَدًا وَمَا تَدْرِي نَفْسٌ بِأَيِّ أَرْضٍ تَمُوت

That was all she said, smiling, laughing, yet I knew that, behind that laugh, she was depressed, I didn’t understand why, she also sounded desperate, I was not sure for what or why, yet felt it in her voice, in every word she said. I was devastated that I couldn’t help her, I couldn’t even listen to her to comfort her, for she had nothing to say this time… and I couldn’t read what was up with her… I was always able to read her right and see through her… not this time… there was something I couldn’t detect, feel or understand… suddenly she started sharing where she kept things and how she wants who to get what when she dies! And she actually sent me an email that looked like a will! I found myself crying! She’s my friend! And she’s so young to think that way, when I told her so she laughed and said: why are you worried or crying, it’s simple it is all about:

وَمَا تَدْرِي نَفْسٌ مَّاذَا تَكْسِبُ غَدًا وَمَا تَدْرِي نَفْسٌ بِأَيِّ أَرْضٍ تَمُوتُ

I told her to stop it, I was the one who was getting depressed now, I told her I loved her so much and that she’s my best friend ever and that she needs to shut up and stop talking that way, all she told me was that she knew what she meant to me and that’s exactly why she chose me to share all the secrets that we always kept safe with each other…

She’s a happy spirit, a smiling energizing person, who was always there for me and so was I for her, she’s my little girl, my friend, my sister, and my cousin, we’ve been best friends all of our lives, and I got really worried when we had that talk… I know that she seems nonchalant and gives an impression of happiness, yet I also know the deep sadness she is keeping inside of her… Not sure what got it on the surface now… yet well… I hope she feels better and gets back to her happy smile…

Monday, March 28th 2011

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